What's the difference between WW2 kamikaze planes and 9/11?
One of the missions succeeded.
Short Jokes
Why do gay people like sports?
Because they get to play with balls.
So, my girlfriend left me. I took her wheelchair, and she came back crawling.
Simplest way to tell if dogs are better than cats: My dog is named Curiosity, and your cat is dead.
The 911 people really didn't scramble fast enough, so they got folded like an omelet.
When you realize you forgot to mop your room, you hear footsteps.
Pick up lines.
"One fish, two fish, three fish, I’m breaking up with you, b*tch!"
"Hey there little mister, I’m dating your sister."
The good thing about being gay in school is that you can be the best student and still get all the D's.
What do you call a bunch of Paki's jumping off a cliff?
Chocolate drops.
What do you call it when a chameleon won't change colors?
A reptile dysfunction.
My cousin asked me, "What do you think was going through Hitler's mind right before he died?"
I told him, "Probably a bullet."
Did the people of England see a "game over" sign in the sky when the queen died?
Your hairline's so messed up that even Martin Luther King Jr. couldn't have a dream about it.
If you’ve got depression, then your life is a joke. Everyone laughs at both.
People trying to stop me from being depressed: “Just cheer up!”
Me: “WOW, I NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT!”
What were the Fortnite kid's last words? "I didn't know pumps are back in the game!"
How do you tell if someone is depressed?
The brains on the wall.
Violence is never the answer:
It's the solution.
Yesterday I wanted to look up the term "procrastination".
I swear, I'll do it tomorrow.
What time is it when it turns 13 o'clock?
Time to get a new watch.
