Short jokes
I tried to warn my son about playing Russian roulette. It went in one ear and out the other.
I groomed 2 minors today.
What do you call a suicide bomber in a wheelchair?
An RCXD (remote control explosive).
Why did Joe Biden visit Hiroshima? Because the city has the hottest prepubescent girls in the world.
Nah c'mon guys, we don't let jokes like this fly around here.
You know how in Pinocchio the French puppets have the thigh rings?
Well, I got them too! Only red and thinner.
What does Michael Jackson do with his meat? "Just beat it". His song btw lol.
What do you call a sneaky child molester?
Incogpedo.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They can't find home.
"Man, your jokes about homicide are totally killer!"
My girlfriend said onions were the only foods that make you cry.
Until I threw a watermelon in her face.
Dogs can't operate MRI machines.
But cat scan!
What did Michael Jackson say to the child sitting on him?
“Just beat it! Just beat it!”
A normal kid brings an MP3 to school.
A rich kid brings an MP4 to school.
A quiet kid brings an MP5.
Man 1: Why don’t we just put all the debt in the world on one man, then kill him?
Man 2: We tried that once. It started a cult.
Why does Spiderman only have 11 months in his calendar?
Because he lost May!
Q: What comes before 47?
A: AK
Kid: What is the biggest mistake you made in your life?
Parents: Go look above the bathroom sink.
Kid goes and looks, but then he realizes.
When I get suicidal, everyone worries. I don't know why because that is when I'm the happiest, thinking about death.
What's the difference between an emo kid and a leaf? Only the leaf reaches the ground.