Short jokes
Why are there a lot of whites in hockey?
It’s the only other job that involves beating something black other than being a cop.
Why do people not play Uno with Mexicans? Because they are always stealing the green cards.
What do you call a fat girl with a rape whistle?
Optimistic.
What did one butt cheek say to the other? “Between you and me, it stinks in here!”
I am disabled and I find these jokes appropriately hilarious.
SON: “Mommy, I found Daddy!”
MOM: “What did I tell you about digging in the garden?”
If a crippled man told stories about himself, would that be called VeggieTales?
Where did Johnny go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
Unlike my syndrome, I keep my chin up. 🙌🏽😁
Cannibal (n.) Someone who is fed up with people.
What's a skeleton's favorite plant? A bone-zai tree. But if they don't like that one, how about a s-pine tree?
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
Spareribs!
Vagina jokes aren't funny.
Most of the time.
Man, choking on sugar seems like the sweetest way to die.
A priest, a rapist, a pedophile, and a homosexual walk into a bar.
He orders a drink.
What is the difference between American teenage girls and Muslim teenage girls? -- American teenage girls get stoned *before* they have sex.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal?
His shoulder.
My girlfriend asked me if we could have anal sex, and I said, "What's that?" She said, "I fuck her ass." I said, "Oh, my uncle calls that shhhhh."
What is the Titanic's favorite mint?
Icebreakers.
What is the Harry Potter spell that aborts babies?
Fetus Deletus!