What do blind kids and orphans have in common? Neither of them can see their parents.
What do the twin towers and my ex-girlfriend have in common? They both went down on my dad.
What do me and Monster cans have in common? A barcode.
What do white people and fences have in common? They both get jumped by Mexicans.
Girl: "Come over."
Orphan: "I can't."
Girl: "My parents aren't home ;)"
Orphan: "Oh cool, something we have in common."
What do strippers and peanut butter have in common? They both spread for bread.
What do a politician and a minister have in common?
Both of them will tell you anything to get money from you.
What does a relationship and suicide have in common?
I always fail on committing.
What do five dicks sticking out of glory holes and five udders both have in common? They are ready for milking.
What do a pedophile and a clock have in common? Neither of them go past 12.
What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common? Once they're gone they never come back.
What does a priest and a wristwatch have in common? They both start at 12.
What does a turtle and a pedophile have in common? They both want to get there before the hare does.
What do Michelangelo and Hitler have in common?
They both used their brain to paint the ceiling.
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common?
Their last big hit was the wall.
What do Catholic priests and JCPenny's have in common?
Little boys' pants half off.
What do a crippled person's legs and the Twin Towers have in common? They both went down and never came back up.
What does a pulse and an orgasm have in common?
I don't care if she has one.
What does your mom and a slinky have in common?
They aren't much to look at, but you can't help but crack a smile when you see them tumbling down the stairs.
What do bicycles and slaves have in common? They both use chains to work.
