Short jokes
Why didn't the child go to school?
Because he died of a heroin overdose.
What did the mic say to the rapper?
"Don’t DROP me, bro!"
What do you call a rapper with bad credit?
Lil Borrow.
What does the long distance call and a Black person have in common?
They both don’t work.
What do Boy Scouts and IG models have in common?
They both be fucking sugar daddies.
I heard P. Diddy got a job as a defensive coordinator.
He’s used to penetrating aggressively.
Why don't you have a life?
Because you're ugly.
Did you get your phone from the desert? No wonder why your texts are always so dry.
I had a threesome on an elevator with a monkey and my underage, deaf, & mentally challenged sister...
It was wrong on so many levels.
I made a song about a tortilla. Well, it's more of a wrap.
You know my first name, but don’t worry about it; you’ll only be screaming my first.
Why can lesbians not drive cars?
They always strap the wrong thing on.
What's the difference between BTS and Futurama? There's only one Bender in Futurama.
Joe Biden would’ve died in the Secret Service tackle. They would have been like, "Get down Mr. Presi-"
My girlfriend who is a Jehovah's Witness had sex with me so hard, she turned to Christianity.
What is Jimmy Savile's favorite Roblox game?
"Undress to Impress."
How does a woman scare their gynecologist?
By becoming a ventriloquist.
What do you get when you cross a corrupt lawyer with a crooked politician?
Chelsea Clinton.
I just prevented a 10-year-old from getting assaulted.
Nothing much, I just decided to go home.
Are you a razor? 'Cause you make me red.