Short jokes

My mom told me to recycle the trash. I guess I’m taking you for another bike ride!

What’s the difference between an apple and an orphan?

Apples get picked.

Don't break girls' hearts. Break their legs instead. They're two.

"Go frick a cow!"

"I already fricked your mother."

What's the difference between an emo and a prisoner?

The prisoner.

What did the emo guy say to the emo girl?

"Like ur cute g."

"OH MY GOD! IT SPEAKS!"

"It looks like she went into Claire’s Boutique, fell on a sale rack, and said, ‘I’ll take it!’" — Bianca Del Rio, RuPaul’s Drag Race

You just might be why the middle finger was invented in the first place.

I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.

You are more disappointing than an unsalted pretzel.

I forgot the world revolves around you. My apologies! How silly of me.

"Go back to Party City, where you belong!" — Phi Phi O’Hara, RuPaul’s Drag Race.

You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room.

Someday you'll go far.

Hispanic and Latino people be like, "No more immigrants!" Like, dude, aren't you an immigrant?

What is the most gangster paper?

Rapping paper.

"I love all mankind!" said the cannibal.

Why do orphans suck at baseball? Because they never could play catch.

A Down syndrome child is drowning, he calls for help with all of his voice: "Somebody help me!! I'm Downing!"

BA DUM TSS