Short jokes
I found the best GoFundMe: https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-get-the-time-machine.
What’s the difference between erotic and kinky?
Erotic is usually a feather. Kinky is using the whole chicken.
I asked the librarian if they had any books on anxiety.
She replied with, "Won't you worry a lot about returning it late?"
Why did the pencil want to kill himself?
He had no point in life.
Even Michael Jordan can't dunk from your hairline! 🤣🤣
I tried to fight a razor. It cut me so deep I thought I would die.
Turns out he didn't kill me. I was never happy, but that shit made me angry.
God, when terminally ill children beg him to heal them:
God: No, I don’t want to.
What's an emo's favorite way of growing food?
The slash and burn tactic.
Why didn’t the train kill nine families of four?
Because he had no loco-MOTIVE. AHAHAH
What’s worse than banging your sister?
Having to wear your dad’s wedding ring.
Don't give emos crack, they're high enough.
I forgot the joke I wanted to say.
Chat, is this real?
What do the initials "MAD" stand for?
Mothers Against Democrats.
What'd the farmer say when a coyote killed and ate his rooster?
"No, you ate my cock!"
How do rappers make their money?
By dropping dimes.
How is tightrope walking like getting a blowjob from someone ugly?
If you want to enjoy either, you absolutely can’t look down.
What did the water say to the cup?
"Good day!"
Unfortunately, NASCAR has been canceled.
The woke people heard that it was a human traffic ring.
What’s the difference between a crossdresser and a trans person?
About 3 years.
A fat homeless person begged me for food, so I said, "I can see your dinner. You had plenty!"