Short jokes
I had a joke about pizza, it's just too cheesy.
How do birds pay? With their bills!
You need to play a B flat, not a C sharp, you just got band!
Person: You suck!
Me: Tell that to your mom, and she’ll say the same thing, honey. 😎
Your breath is so hot, it made the Chicago fire!
How do poets say hello?
Hey, haven’t we metaphor?
The one thing I love about Steven is he stood up for all of his haters. Just kidding!
Did you hear about the Boston marathon? 'Cause, well, I heard it was a blast and that it blew everyone away!
Stephen Hawking's not dead, he is just in airplane mode.
How do spiders reach the internet?
Through the World Wide Web!
I got a new job at a trampoline park the other day. If I’m being honest, it’s got its ups and downs.
What is a fat boy's favorite karate move?
A pork chop.
What did the Ford Mustang say to the crowd of innocent people?
I'D HIT THAT!
I told a cookie a joke the other day.
It just crumbled.
Why didn't the newest Star Wars movie start with the classic scrawl?
Because it was a Rogue One!
Stormtrooper: What should I do about my overdue library book?
Palpatine: Renew it!
Fun fact: Toasters were originally called tanning breads!
Why do basketball players hate gravity?
Because it's always bringing them down.
Why don't ants get sick?
Because they have anty-bodies.
Are you a mirror, because I see myself in you?