Physicist jokes
The other day at school we had to write down our hero and what we would do if they walked into our house. I got off easy because my hero is Stephen Hawking.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite type of comedy? Stand up.
Why has Stephen Hawking stopped playing hide and seek with his wife? Because she keeps using a metal detector.
Stephen Hawking isn't really dead, he's just rebooting.
Now that Stephen Hawking is dead, the jokes will start to roll in just like he used to.
What is Stephen Hawking's least favorite movie?
Standing Tall.
It's funny how Stephen Hawking sounds like Stephen walking or Stephen talking, but he can't do any of those things.
Who's the best at musical chairs?
Stephen Hawking.
What were Stephen Hawking's last words? "System failure."
In 2011, Stephen Hawking said there is no God. In 2018, God said there is no Steve Hawking.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal?
His shoulder.
What gang was Stephen Hawking in? The Crips.
Why was Stephen Hawking's wife mad at him?
She caught him having an affair with his shoulder.
I can't find out where Stephen Hawking is from, I just can't place his accent.
I knocked on Stephen Hawking's door, but nobody answered...
All I got was "error 404 page not found."
Why did Steven Hawking not go to heaven after he died?
He could not get up the stairs?
How did Stephen Hawking die?
They unplugged the wifi.
Why did Stephen Hawking die? He didn't pay his electricity bills.
What does Stephen Hawking say after sex? That was wheely good.
What is black and at the top of a staircase?
Stephen Hawking after a house fire.