Short jokes
What’s the difference between a firefighter and Snoop Dogg?
Snoop Dogg inhaled less smoke during 9/11.
What’s one thing Obama proved during his presidency?
No matter how far a brotha gets in life, he’s still going to have the cops on his back.
Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.
What's the best way to catch a fish? Ask someone to throw it to you.
Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
What has 4 hairy legs and fucks my sister?
Me & my dad!
Roses are red, Violets are ugly.
Violet thought she was ugly until she saw you!
"If you can make them laugh and giggle, you can make their booty shake and jiggle."
What do you call a space Muslim?
A Tusken Raider.
What's the difference between John Wayne and Jack Daniels?
Jack Daniels is still killing Indians.
What's the difference between Jedi and a rapist?
Nothing, they both use the Force to get what they want.
What does a Travis Scott concert and the Titanic cabin have in common? The music doesn’t stop when people start dying.
I taped a picture of Bill Cosby to my gun, now it's an assault rifle.
What do Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?
They both come while you’re asleep.
My last relationship ended because I didn’t open the car door for her. Instead, I just went to the top of the water.
If being sexy were a crime, you better lock me up.
Not because I'm sexy, but because I have 5 dead children in my basement.
Lately, I’ve been wearing sunglasses when I have sex.
So I don’t get pepper sprayed.
The couple next door made a porn film.
They don’t know it yet.
Why did God create women before men?
He didn’t want any advice on how to do it.
Long time since I made a joke, huh? I used a Time Machine to make this one.