Utterance Jokes

What do you call a cow jumping over barbed wire? Utter destruction.

Pick a number, syckkkkkkk, that’s the wrong number.

Why does a milking stool have 3 legs?

Because the cow has the udder one.

gdqvgj

Oh well, I.H.N.! I.H.N.!! I.H.N.!!!

First human comes.

Sans: That was pun intended.

What makes jokes because it's lonely and a complete and utter loser?

This guy, yep, this guy right here.

Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Two friends fighting.

Friend 3: "Cut it out, you two!"

Friend 4: "It wouldn't help if they cut it out... Believe me... I've tried..."

Me when the your, uh, uhhhh, when your me when the your, uhhh, uhhhhh, mom.

Friend 1: Did you?

Depressed friend 2: I didn't!

Friend one: Swear on your life!

Depressed friend 2: I swear.

A week later friend 2 dropped dead to their utter delight.

A drunk walks out of a bar late at night and sees a nun walking past on the footpath. He utters something hateful to himself as he begins running, building momentum before launching himself at the nun, catching her with a massive superman punch to the back of the head, knocking her tumbling brutally to the pavement.

He proceeded with a swift kicking to the nun's ribs and spine before grabbing the nun by the scruff of her habit and lifting her limp to her feet till face to face. Looking the nun dead in her eyes with menace, the drunk victoriously growled, "You're not so bloody tough tonight, are ya, Batman?"

Hi. Hhhh yrddd.

Uhhhh...

Aha!

"Stop it," said he.

What did the man say about someone who had a seizure?

"Jit was lagging."

BAD!!!!!!

Yeoooo.

Yes yes yes the yes yes he did but what u tolk xjxfjgjcmbjhdkggdjlud.