Short jokes
What kind of animal makes a good bottle opener?
A male Duck on Viagra.
The worst comedians take 9 months to make a joke. Then they spend the rest of their lives trying to forget it.
"Why did the band teacher get arrested?"
"For fingering a minor." Ahaha, so funny!
Q: What do men and math tests have in common?
A: They get cheated on.
People say that Pakistan is a terrorist nation...
Guys, it's not true, even Osama bin Laden lived there peacefully for 6 years.
Osama bin Laden rated America.
He gave us a 9/11.
Osama Bin Laden was trying to give me relationship advice.
Probably wasn't the best time to say "OK Boomer."
Osama Bin Laden, Josef Stalin, and Hitler are robbing a bank, who do the cops shoot first?
A black guy.
I went to a restaurant and a waiter took my order. She had two black eyes, so I ordered real slow.
Because obviously she doesn’t listen.
I am Asian.
I am so Asian my pronouns are: heeEEE/Ya.
How do you make the grass cut itself?
Make it depressed.
I wasn't going to tell another emo joke, but I didn't want to leave anyone hanging.
The best part about Asian jokes is that the only people that can be offended can't see the jokes.
What’s the difference between me and Glow In The Dark Intelligent Putty? The putty’s intelligent!
Roses are red, I'm not a boaster.
Elon must've got rushed to the hospital after impregnating a toaster.
When you reconstruct Michael Jackson and Lil Nas X to wreak havoc on preschool.
Me yelling every gay slur to get suspended.
I’m in catholic school.
When the emo girl is in a movie and the director says, "Cut."
There is a lot of difference between a man and a woman saying, "I went through a whole box of tissues watching that movie."
Cheap oil, no immigration, and no school shootings.
Corona did what Trump promised.