Short jokes
How much does a pirate pay for corn?
A buccaneer!
What animal gets easily offended? The chicken; they always get roasted.
My true hero is the person who killed Hitler.
Want to hear something that’ll make you smile? Your face muscles.
How do you annoy Pinocchio?
Ask him, "Do you always tell lies?"
What happens when you cross a rhetorical question with a joke?
How do Chinese people name their children?
They drop a tin can down a flight of stairs and call them the sound that's made.
What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay guy? You have to ask permission before stuffing it with meat.
I was having sex with my girl, and she said she likes it rough, so I socked her in the face.
When you're playing online with your friend, then you hear a kid scream: "No, Dad, please stop!" Scream ends with a gunshot.
What do you call a cow that is really sad? Utterly Depressed. HEHEHEHE
Why did the Mafia cross the road?
Forget about it...
Dodo.
I am a motherfucker.
What do you call a Krispy Kreme Donut combined with a Big Mac from McDonalds?
A Krispy Kreme Mac.
What do you call a gay threesome?
A Sloppy Joe.
My favorite quote will always be, "Sketchy candy is better than no candy."
- One of the thousands of missing children.
What do gay girls order in a bar?
Pussy juice.
How do you get 500 dead babies into a car?
A blender.
How do you get 500 dead babies out of a car?
A straw.
Do you know why you should never let a blonde handle grenades?
They'll end up only throwing the pin.