Your hair line goes back when my gran died and she hurried 6 foot undee

When a 68 year old teacher says: I am going to tackle an intruder if i have to!

Me: Oh hell nah

Your mum is so fat she eats every meal from KFC, MACCAS, HUNGRY JACKS ALL AT ONCE!!!!!

My friend said let's have a sleep over..... Little did I know it was just at prison

I almost got caught watching porn.My mom got the bill for the account but luckily dad had my back.I mean we do use the same account

Whats yellow and blue and found at the bottom of a pool? A baby with slashed floaties