Short jokes
Why can't a cheetah play hide and seek?
Because he's always spotted.
Have you heard about the canoe sale down the road? It was an ordeal.
Have you heard my cherry joke? It's pitiful.
That one person who can never bring a smile to your face...
Until you push them down 3 flights of stairs.
What do you call a vegan cow?
A vegan cow. :/
OR
A regular cow. 🐄🙌
Why do they put barcodes on the ships in Norway?
Why?
So when they come into port, they can Scan-de-navian.
Who are you?
Yourself.
Your dick is as flat as your grandma's heart rate.
What is a cow's favorite water sport?
Ca-MOO-ing!
What is the difference in having a granny fetish and necrophilia? A few weeks.
"Ching chong, drop the bomb!"
What did the kid with cancer say? "Can-I see my mom one more time?"
Only a genius can say this.
I am stupid.
Bin Laden was the hide and seek champion for 10 years, 2001-2011.
My girlfriend is like Toys R Us.
She does not exist.
What’s red and cries?
A skinned baby in a bag of salt.
Age is just a number,
Jail is just a room.
What is Julius Caesar’s favorite food?
Roman noodles.
I fucked a chick named Macy, but she had dyslexia.
So I ended up doing the YMCA.
Kid: "I wish I could be like Batman!"
Genie: "Wish granted!"
When the kid gets home, both of his parents are dead.