Shooting

Shooting jokes

Aussie

An Aussie, an Asian, and a Frenchman are in a bar.

The Asian throws his whiskey in the air and shoots it. The Frenchman asks, "Why did you do that?" The Asian says, "There are plenty of them where we come from."

The Frenchman throws his champagne in the air and shoots it. Then the Aussie asks, "Why did you do that?" The Frenchman replies, "There are plenty of them where we come from."

The Aussie then throws his beer up in the air and shoots the Asian. Then the Frenchman asked, "Why did you do that?" The Aussie then replies, "There are plenty of them where we come from."

Size

Three guys walk into a bar: one Asian, one American, one Black.

A girl walks in and says if all three of your D*** sizes don't add up to 12 inches, I will shoot you.

First comes the American with 3 inches, then the Black man with 8.

It totals out to 11 and they look at the Asian and say "Oh no."

He comes to 1 inch to top off the twelve.

She walks away and says ok.

The Asian says, "You're lucky she was hot, so I had a boner!"

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  • Deer

    When you’re hunting at a forest resort and you shoot a deer, but then you remember that there are no deer at the forest resort.

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  • School shooting

    So there was a school shooting in Florida. Why didn't the shooter just go to Disney?.......sorry, I just work there and I'm trying to get people to come on down.

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  • Memes

    Reason

    I bought a rainbow gun, but for some reason it doesn’t shoot straight.

    ADHD

    Why can't a kid with ADHD shoot a gun?

    Their focus is always off.

    Corona

    Cheap oil, no immigration, and no school shootings.

    Corona did what Trump promised.

    Gun

    If someone has a gun and tries to shoot you, just say, “Hipity hoppity, that gun is my property.”

    Cop

    What does the handicapped man say to the cops when he’s mistaken for a criminal: "Don't shoot, I'm unarmed!"

    Bullet

    I made an AR that shoots boo boo bullets. It does poison time 10x damage. You have a very good chance of getting STD. Very good AR. Going for 100,000. Email: EatandDrinkbouls@gmail.com

    Pedophile

    What's the similarity between pedophiles and school shooters?

    They both shoot when they see kids.

    Kid

    What's the difference between a white kid and a computer?

    The child has no trouble shooting.

    School shooting

    Why did the Royal Wedding get more publicity than the SantaFe school shooting?

    'Cause Royal Weddings don't happen every week.

    Shooting Range

    I went to my local shooting range today but was surprised when I saw on the news that there was a school shooting in my shooting range. I don't know who snitched...