Shooting jokes
Little Timmy said, "I had a body, eieio, now you are next!" as he shoots you.
What is the best revenge for getting punished at school?
Go shoot up the school.
My best friend was recently gunned down in a drive-by shooting and died a virgin, but he wasn’t buried one.
What do you call a cow that has been shot?
Holy cow!
Weed: *gets hit by his own power*
Cop: Wait, shouldn’t you be resistant to your own element?
Weed: Are you resistant to bullets when you shoot a gun?
I will remember my auntie's last words: "If you shoot me, your p-nis is small!"
(gun shot)
A nun going down a water shoot? She never felt so wet in all her life!
The way to stop school shootings is to give children an RPG.
*America shoots down balloon*
China: "You killed an innocent man!!"
USA: "What?!"
China: "Yes, he was a famous sumo wrestler."
What would you do after seeing your most loved one shot? Reload.
Why can’t anyone sing “hit me with your best shot” at the veterans ball karaoke?
Because every time she sang the line “fire away,” someone started shooting!
If the noose breaks, stab yourself!
If the knife is dull, shoot yourself!
If the gun's out of ammo, *YOU'RE HERE TO SUFFER ETERNALLY.*
Get the gun, shoot it up your bum!
Kid: "THERE'S A SHOOTER IN THE BUILDING!"
Shooter: "Oops."
Q: Why did Hitler shoot himself?
A: Because his mother taught him to take out the trash.
Why should you shoot a homeless crackhead in the head?
Because they're basically zombies.
Did you hear about the Syrian guy that shot a bunch of people? He was Robert Kurd.
Your forehead is so deep, not even curry can shoot from that deep.
October 1, 2017 is when the Mandalay Bay became the Mandalay spray. Thank Steve for that.
What's the difference between a school shooting pistol and a baked potato? The physical composition, of course, but they both pack the same heat.