Gun violence

Gun Violence Jokes

School shooting

An American is lecturing a British person, saying things like "it's an elevator, not a lift" and "it's chips, not crisps" etc. After a while of this, the British person calmly retorted, "they're schools, not shooting ranges."

Drug Cartel

Why are Americans so shocked when it comes to Mexican drug cartels?

Because none of the drug lords (or their associates, for that matter) have shot up a school.

School shooting

So, I was at a funeral the other day, and it was a school shooting mass funeral. The lady beside me asked me, “What do you think was going through their heads?” And I replied, “Probably a bullet.” She was furious and said, “How dare you! You have no idea what those kids were probably going through!” And I replied, “Well, they were going through anything the bullet was going through them.”

Shooting

Teachers at a school shooting be like: damn it. That's the third one this week and it's only Monday.

School Shooter

When the school shooter is right outside the classroom window, and the autistic kid starts trying to say hello to him.

School

I never get school shooting jokes.

Maybe they're aimed at a younger audience.

Military

Why does the United States have such a good military? Because they learn to dodge bullets in school.

School Shooter

If a school shooter walks into a classroom and shoots an autistic kid, what does the kid say? "Why do I look like Swiss cheese?"

School shooting

POV there’s a school shooting.

American: First time, European?

European: Yeah, you American?

American: No, not my first time.

School shooting

*School shooting happens.*

Foreign exchange student: *Sobbing under desk.*

American student: "First time?"

Foreign exchange student: "Yeah, you?"

American student: "Hahaha. No, not my first time."