Shooting jokes
Ramsey Bevan
Did you hear about the bull who went on a shooting rampage?
I guess he was a little deranged.
So if you say a bear shoots children, and Leah likes Mason Boswells, and I go to Benjamin Adlard year 6.
Why are Americans such good marksmen?
Because they had plenty of schools to practice their shooting.
Q: What do you call an angry, bullied Asian kid?
Shoo Ting.
🥲🥲🥲
Joseph Rosenbaum died doing what he loved: chasing minors.
There were four people in a helicopter: Trump, a first-grade kid, a schoolteacher, and the Chinese leader.
There were only three parachutes. The Chinese leader takes one and jumps. The schoolteacher says she has to teach, so she jumps. Trump and the first-grader are left. Trump says, "I've lived my life; you take the last one." So the kid puts on his backpack and jumps. Trump makes it out safe.
What's the difference between Fortnite and PUBG?
I don't know.
During the Great War, a man holding a machine gun shoots down a swarm of soldiers running on a swamp.
He says: "You came to the wrong swamp, Americans! You came to the wrong swamp!" *He didn't stop firing.*
What's Osama bin Laden's favorite song?
"Under the Sea," from The Little Mermaid.
How do you prevent a physics teacher from drowning? Shoot her before she touches the water.
So the fire alarm went off, but as soon as they walked out of the classroom, the only fire they saw was out of a gun.
I was gonna go to a shooting gallery, but I realized that schools aren't open on Sundays.
Why was the kid not able to cross the hallway?
Answer: The school shooter already shot him in the middle of the hallway.
A burglar breaks into the home of a weapons engineer. He wants to steal some of his weapons from his strictly secured chamber. When he breaks in through the window to go into his weapons cellar, he realizes that the inventor is at home and heard him from upstairs.
The burglar shouts, "Hands up, there is no escape!" The engineer shouts, "What do you want from me?" The thief answers impatiently, "Well, what do you think? I know what you're hiding here. Get me entry to your armory, right away!" "Never in my life will I do that!" The burglar pulls out his pistol, "Either you let me in, or you go for it!"
"Well, I'll give up, I'll give you my guns. Please don't shoot me." The burglar grins gleefully, "Thank you." "I even have a gun here that I've been working on lately. You can have it." The burglar then thinks and grunts, "Okay, before you open up, you'll show me this first!"
The inventor says, "It's shooting plasma. You can test it on one of my practice goals that I've made while I'm unlocking," and points to a side room where various dummies with targets are set up. The burglar walks into the room with the targets, focuses on the red dot in the middle of the disc, and pushes off. But the gun does not fire plasma or at the target. Instead, the gun fires a bullet at the burglar. This causes him to bleed to the ground.
The engineer behind him began to laugh, "Hahaha! I knew you were falling for it! This is not a plasma gun at all; this is my latest invention, especially for burglars like you: the backward-shooting pistol."
Why did the boy shoot the clock?
When you're the only one bullying the weird kid and you're absent on the day he shoots up the school. ̄\_(ツ)_/ ̄
Grandfather's last words: "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"
Grandmother's last words: "You know how to use that hammer."
Dad's last words: "Always aim before you shoot that gun."
Mom's last words: "Turn off the stove when you're done."
My last thought: Am I a murderer?
You need to fuck off with this website. It's shit.
I looked up how fast cum shoots and it said 28 mph. That means that ejaculation is illegal in school zones!