Ejaculation jokes

Say what you will of pedophiles, but you can't ignore their problem with immature ejaculation.

Q. How much cum does a gay guy have?

A. A butt load.

Ejaculated in her braces, call that children behind bars.

What's the difference between apples and dead babies?

I don't ejaculate on apples before I eat them.

I looked up how fast cum shoots and it said 28 mph. That means that ejaculation is illegal in school zones!

Girls Are Yummy Stupid

Are Really Erectable

Tasty Honey Ejaculable

Booty Everything Sucking Titties

Gays don't be mad, read the first letter of every word :D

My doctor told me it was perfectly normal to become aroused or even ejaculate during a prostate exam.

That being said I wish he hadn't!

So I found out a rainbow is basically where a guy ejaculates in a female's mouth and she swallows her period juice and they both kiss each other, swishing it together in each other's mouth, and it forms a rainbow.

And a strawberry shortcake is basically where a dude ejaculates on a female's face and then punches her in the nose, causing her to bleed. That's why it's called a strawberry shortcake.

Remember kids, ejaculate, then evacuate.

As soon as I saw your mom, my Premature Ejaculation went off.

What did the mad penis say to the vagina? “Don’t make me come in there!”

A panda goes to see a hooker. He goes down on her, he mates with her, he ejaculates and then he attempts to walk away.

The working girl asks, "Aren't you going to pay me?"

She opens the dictionary to "Prostitute: One who sells sexual companionship for money."

The panda picks up the dictionary and turns to the definition "Panda: A marsupial who eats, roots, shoots, and leaves."

Q: Why doesn’t Jimmy Swaggart worry about his premature ejaculation problem?

A: He believes in the second cumming.

How can you tell if you have a high sperm count?

When your girlfriend has to chew before she swallows.

Any girl can be a squirter if you hit the right artery.

Gary and Steve are having sex and the phone rings. Steve goes to answer the phone and tells Gary, "Hey, don't finish yourself until I get back." After returning from the other room, there is cum all over the bed and wall of the bedroom. "Jesus, Gary, I said not to finish yourself until I got back!" Gary turns to him and says, "I didn't, I farted."

Did you ever receive an anonymous blowjob from another male under the handicapped stall inside the public men's restroom at a rest area and did you have an orgasm and was it the best orgasm that you ever had?

What’s another name for cumming inside a woman?

Loading the dishwasher.