Sexuality jokes

I masturbated by accident. I read the wrong thing And tested its factuality.

Well, it's been some good years now, haven't they? Being your own partner has never felt so together.

What's the difference between a gay man and a hairline?

The hairline is way straighter.

What do you get when you cross a lesbian and a platypus? I lick a lot of pussy.

Q: How can you tell if a Western is gay?

A: All the good guys are hung.

How did my dad know I was gay?

He stuck his cock in me and I liked it.

Some guy asked me, "Are you better than my meat?" I said, "No, I'm not better, I just beat it all the time."

I bet you like men!

Why does Aaron like men? Because his dad beats him.

I'm so glad I am not gay. It seems like a pain in the ass.

LOL.

What do Ligma and Bofa have in common?

They both ride on my dick.

Lady: "Can I lick your balls?"

Me: "Ummmmm, ok?"

Lady: *grabs ball sack and licks my balls*

Me: "I'm gonna have to clean these now!"

Lady: "Let me do that."

Me: "No, thank you! I have to use these baseballs for practice!"

Want a kiss, daddy? Want a blow job?

I was doing a race, and I started after everyone 'cause I fell, but when I got up I realized I couldn't even race, not because I was behind, but because I can't go straight if I'm gay...

Q: What do you call a gay cowboy?

A: A jolly rancher.

My girlfriend is growing watermelons, not in the ground though (we had fun that night)!

Think about how many more girls we guys could get if we talked to them how we talk to other guys, like when they say, "Can I borrow a pencil?" You say, "You can borrow this hard wood dick."

I just did a test to see who my soulmate is, and it said "best friend." So I guess I am gay. I think so, WTF.

Roses are red, grass is greener.

When I think of you, I play with my weiner.

I don’t call it special ED, I call it mixed vegetables.

I'd tell you a joke about my boyfriend's dick, but it's a private joke.