Sex jokes
Q. What's a dog's favourite type of sex? A. Ruff.
What do math and me on P-hub have in common?
They are both hard.
I just had sex...
I think I nailed it!
(Shit joke, I know.)
What is the definition of auto masturbation?
Fellatio.
What do you say when Jack's late to sex ed?
"Aye-jack-you-late!"
What is the difference between interstate and intercourse?
What is the difference between a carpet muncher and a female prostitute?
If you want a female prostitute to be a carpet muncher, you have to give her money.
I once masturbated in the bathroom.
I was looking for something, for a little help.
Looked in the wardrobe and found something perfect.
I'LL NEVER SEE A TOOTHBRUSH THE SAME WAY AGAIN!
Chuck Norris came up with the name for Walker, Texas Ranger in sheer brilliance. You can arrange each letter for the name of the show to display the true name being "Wrangler Karate Sex!"
My boyfriend tried to make me have sex on the hood of his Honda Civic, but I refused. If I’m going to have sex, it’s going to be on my own Accord.
Why don’t Mexicans have sex education and driver's education on the same day?
Because the donkey gets tired.
💪 💪 🏋️♂️ What do you get when you cross a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a bukkake slut, and a physically disabled gay white male who works out at the gym, who is a sex worker?
Cum Junkie.
Jack & Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick her candy...but Jack got a shock and a mouth full of c0ck cuz Jill's real name was Randy.
Your mini pecker is so small, the taxi driver said the ride was so short that he'd do it for free.
When she says "parents aren't home" so you rush upstairs.
What is more used than plastic?
Hookers.
When a deaf person has sex, do they use one hand to moan?
Why did God create sex for marriage?
Because he wanted more people and less fun.
What do you call it when Red Sox can't pull out?
Boston cream pie.
Last night I had sex and she said, "Stop talking about s***, OMG!" and I made her scream so loud she said, "Her balls hurt!"