Science jokes
Never trust an atom; they make up everything.
How do you throw a space party?
You planet! 🤣🤣🤣
How do you organize a space party?
You planet.
So I was on Google, and on my computer it had Windows. When Stephen Hawking died, it shut down, the shutdown sound played, and wouldn't turn on again.
What’s Stephen Hawking's favorite song? Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes.
What is the difference between the snow ❄️ and sun 🌞? Snow is slippery, and the other kind 🧒 of weather is not slippery.
Do people live on the Earth 🌏? Yes, a lot of people live on the Earth 🌎.
How does an apple fall from a tree?
I don't know, ask Sir Isaac Newton!
Do you know why no one speaks about George Washington?
John Adams turned him into atoms. John Adams was an alien.
What is the difference between me and a retard?
At least I have chromosomes.
Short people tend to get angry easily...
'Cause they're so close to the ground, their anger doesn't dissipate easily...
Have you ever stepped foot in Stephen Hawking's house? 'Cause he hasn't either.
Do you think Stephen Hawking could ever plug his Instagram or anything?
I love Stephen Hawking jokes so much because they roll off the tongue so nicely.
Why did the ion always lose at Go Fish?
Because he was playing with a cheetah!
NASA recently found evidence of water on Mars... Mars 1, Africa 0.
What do dentists call their x-rays?
Tooth picks.
EXPERIMENT SUCCESSFUL 😱😱 Scientists have created an element named Pessomium 😳😳
Characteristics: - Highly reactive only in Bolivia and Panama 😡🤬 - Turns invisible when in Brazil or Uruguay 🥵🤧 - Finished 😹🤕 - 0 protons 0 electrons 0 goals 0 assists 7 debuts 🥶
How does NASA fart?
They fart with their ass-teroids.
EMMETT BROWN IS FAT.