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Die

Anonymous

Student: 503 bricks are on a plane. 1 falls off. How many are left?

Teacher: 502.

Student: How do you put an elephant in a fridge?

Teacher:No you can’t fit an elephant in a fridge!!

Student: Just open door, put elephant in, close door.

Student: How do you put a giraffe in the fridge?

Teacher: open door,put giraffe in, close door

Student: no! Open door, take elephant out, put giraffe in, close door.

Student: The Lion King is having a B-day party. All the animals are there, except one. Which one? Teacher: let me guess the lion?

Student: No!The giraffe because He’s in a fridge.

Teacher: WOW!

Student: Sally has to get across a large river home to many alligators. They are very dangerous, but Sally swims across safely. How?

Teacher: Sally stepped on the alligators mouth?

Student:The gators are at the party.

Student: But Sally dies anyway. Why?

Teacher:She drowned?!

Student: no! She got hit in the head by a flying brick.

Dad

dirty night clown

My family loves to have dance parties. My dad will just play music from his iPod, and I’ll go to the light switch and make a nice strobe light effect. Everyone loves it, especially my younger cousin. He gets down on the floor and starts breakdancing! It makes him so happy, and he needs that extra joy in his life, especially since the doctor recently diagnosed him with epilepsy.

Dad

Morbid

There was a costume party on Halloween. Everyone was there except one guy. Many people asked his brother where he was. His reply was, “Oh, he wanted to be our dad for Halloween.”

Dwarf

Anonymous

What do u call a dwarf suicide bomber? A party popper

Girl

Alabama Boy

So I hooked up with a girl at a party, but I forgot that it was a family reunion. (SWEET HOME ALABAMA STARTS PLAYING

Puns

Bob

A boy went to a costume party with a girl on his back. Someone asked his what he was suppose to be. He answered," A turtle." 'Then why do you have a girl on your back?" the guy asked again. The boy answered, " it’s Michelle."

Light

Anonymous

How do you throw a surprise party at a hospital?

Bring a strobe light into the epilepsy ward.

Depression

LunaRosario16🙃😅➰〰️➰👌

If I was a party, then anxiety must be the cousin depression felt obligated to bring to the party and insomnia the little annoying sibling.

Puns

Anonymous

How does NASA organize a party? – They planet.

Skeleton

Sans

Sans: why didn’t the skeleton not go to the party? Papyrus: because they looked like me? Sans:… Sure

Die

Sally

Time for a story: There are 500 bricks on a plane, one falls off. How many are left?

What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a refrigerator? Open fridge, put in elephant, close fridge.

What are the 4 steps to putting a giraffe in a fridge? Open fridge, take out elephant, put in giraffe, close fridge.

The lion king is having a birthday party. All the animals attend except one, who is it? Giraffe, he’s stuck in the fridge.

Sally wants to cross an alligator infested river. There is no bridge and the only way she can get across is by swimming. She swims across safely, how? The alligators where at the birthday party.

Sally dies anyway. How? She got hit in the head by a flying brick.

Light

Jeff

did you hear about the light bulb party— yeah it was pretty lit!

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Sally

Anonymous

Sally threw herself a birthday party, and only one person showed up. Who is it?

The grim reaper

Toast

I am Major

My favorite toast for parties:

May I be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows I’m dead.

Cow

Anonymous

What is a cow’s favorite party game? Moo-sical chairs!

Politics

Illuminatus66

These days there are only two political parties in India… BJP and anti-BJP…

Skeleton

Anonymous

Why did’nt the skeleton go to the dance party because he had NOBODY to dance with

Puns

Gay Thing

What did the cannibal get when he showed up to the party late??

A cold shoulder

Name

daddyofjokes

Once upon a time, there was a magician named Daniel. He usually did gigs for children and this time he was working at a kid’s birthday party. He walked in and said “Hi boys and girls, my name is Daniel.” He performed multiple tricks, each one amazing the children. Then, he said “And for my final trick; I will disappear!” He lifted up a blanket and when it fell down he was gone. Then, the birthday boy said “Hey, he’s like my dad.” “Really” asked a little girl? “I guessed?” he said back, “My dad wasn’t a magician, but he disappeared. I haven’t seen him since…”

Puns

sub to duckyisverycute

I am throwing a party in space can you help me planet

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