Did you know there’s black holes billions of years old? What’s more amazing is the black holes Stephen Hawking studied We’re only 14 years old.
What’s better than Stephen Hawking? Stephen walking
How do flat-earthers travel? On a plane.
Who led the Israelites through the semipermeable membrane? Osmoses.
Theory is when you know everything but nothing works.
Practice is when everything works but no one knows why.
In our lab, theory and practice are combined: Nothing works and no one knows why.
Steven Hawking had dark humor. Whenever he turned on his laugh effect it diverted power from his screen brightness.
The 6th-grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, “Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?”
No one answered until little Mary stood up and said, “You should not be asking sixth-graders a question like that! I’m going to tell my parents, and they will go and tell the principal, who will then fire you!”
Mrs. Parks ignored her and asked the question again, “Which body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?”
Little Mary’s mouth fell open. Then she said to those around her, “Boy, is she going to get in big trouble!”
The teacher continued to ignore her and said to the class, “Anybody?”
Finally, Billy stood up, looked around nervously, and said, “The body part that increases 10 times its size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye.”
Mrs. Parks said, “Very good, Billy,” then turned to Mary and continued.
“As for you, young lady, I have three things to say: One, you have a dirty mind. Two, you didn’t read your homework. And three, one day you are going to be very, very disappointed.”
TV:Water found on Mars..... Mars:1 Africa:0
There was a solar eclypse at school and we missed it, but it was alright. Your mum went to NASA and recreated it herself.
I have a joke about chemistry, but I don't think it will get a reaction.
My science teacher was talking about natural selection. At one point she asked me to name the first person to theorize about it. I said, Eric Harris It was on his shirt.
If you don't get the joke look up Eric Harris natural selection.
Today my biology teacher asked meh what's commonly found in a cell .................. And apparently black people isn't the right answer
"The rise of atheism is going to lead to a break down of social morals and lead to all kinds of filth including an increase in child abuse" said the village priest. The village scientists did some fact checking. In prison they found roughly 70% of child abusers were hyper religious before committing the crimes, and another 20% converted to religions to look 'remorseful'. The remaining 10% preferred not to say. They presented the findings to the media. "Scientists slander good religious folk and ignore the weight of evidence!" "Is Science biased against religion? You decide in this survey". they reported
The village priest is living at his majesties convenience and tells the others he committed armed robbery.
"Why is this a joke, its not even funny?" Said the person reading this, breaking the forth wall.
What is funny is you got to the end of this post and didn't cringe. Why not?
I went up to my mom and asked how humanity started. She said it started with monkeys, so I went up to my dad and asked. My dad said it all started with Adam and Eve, so I told my dad that mom said humanity started with monkeys, and dad said mom was telling her side of the story. LOL🤣
Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for a glass of H2O. The second one asks for a glass of H2O, too. The second one dies. Why?
Your hairline is like the universe. It's still waiting to be discovered.
In my science class we were watching a video and for no reason at all it started talking about Black Lives Matter and my friend leaned over and whispered “white lives matter more”
Your hairlines so far back even bill nye the science guy couldn't use photosynthesis to fix it.
People say that biting off your finger would be as easy as biting a carrot if your brain didn't try to stop you. How the f do people know that and how many people's fingers did they bite off before coming to that conclusion?
I have to say my humor isn't the best, but I'll give this a go.
My science teacher always reminded us about kilometers per second. Now I want to kilometer per second.
You know those credit card inserters at Walgreens? I want to insert my credit card on my wrist.
I'll shut up now.
