Tongue jokes
How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank his coffee before it was cool.
10 Fun Facts.
1. You can't wash your eyes with soap. 2. You can't count your hair. 3. You can't breathe through your nose with your tongue out. 4. You just tried number 3. 5. When you did number 3, you realized it's possible, only you look like a dog. 6. You're smiling right now because you were fooled. 7. You skipped number 5. 8. You just checked to see if there is a number 5. 9. Share this with your friends to have some fun too :-)
1. You can't wash your eyes with soap.
2. You can't count your hair.
3. You can't breathe through your nose with your tongue out.
4. You just tried number three.
5. When you tried number 3, you realized it was possible, only you look like a dog.
6. You're smiling right now because you realized you were fooled.
7. You skipped number 5.
8. You just checked if there was a number 5.
9. This is not my joke; all credit goes to Steps.
What do you call a vagina with multiple clits?
A tongue workout!
What's the definition of a bastard?
Answer: A man with a 1 inch dick and a 10 inch tongue and all he wants to do is fuck!
What is the best power that man can do? They can move the mountain with their tongue.
How many screws does it take to construct a lesbian's bed?
None, it's all tongue and groove...
There were two snakes slithering along when one snake said to the other snake, "Are we poisonous?" "Idk why?" The other snake responded, "'Cause I just bit my tongue!"
I love Stephen Hawking jokes so much because they roll off the tongue so nicely.
2nd comments from Gwen in her bra.
Keie: Man Man man! I LOVE U!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
heyo: 👅🍑
Bari: STOP U FUCKIN PEDOS!!!!!!!!!!
Kenya Bailey: THAT IS ENOUGH! I AM REPORTING ALL OF THIS CRAP TO THE ADMIN!!!!!!!!!!!
Remera Karwi: Shut up! We jus tellin her she looks like a star no need for all that "crap".
Kenya Bailey: One guy put tongue and peach aka butt I know a little bit about oral sex my friend or not!
You have gaps in your teeth, looks like your tongue is in jail.
My grandfather lost his tongue during WW2.
He never talks about it.
Tongue Trick Sex: The Movie.
Not coming soon!
What do a 9V battery and a butthole have in common?
We know we’re not supposed to put our tongue on them, but we do it anyway.
Snake one: Are we venomous?
Snake two: Yep!... Why do you ask?
Snake one: Cuz I just bit my tongue!!! (Drama scene)
Today was like every other day. It was so terribly long and so terribly dreary. I fear these feelings will never end. I’ll always feel so dark, feel so hopeless. Sometimes all I want is for it to end. For all of it to end, for all of my thoughts to end. I despise the way that always comes to mind. But I feel so lost, feel so hopeless. If something would just work. But nothing has worked. Nothing can fix this. These feelings will pass. These days won't feel so endless... or so absolutely heavy. Just give it some time. Just give it some hope... and some belief. The ‘happy pills’ will work. The doctor says they'll help... they'll help it go away. Just dump the pill in your hand. Let yourself place the little white thing on your tongue... Let yourself throw your head back and swallow. It'll make this better. It should make me feel better.
Everything has changed! The world is so bright— The world is so loud! I don’t know how I never noticed! The sun is so warm— The grass is so green! I feel so awake! I feel so content— I feel so happy! It’s so strange! I’m not anxious— I’m not overthinking! I guess those pills really worked! I think I’m really getting better— I think I’m really going to be happy!
Did you hear about the lesbians who are suing their contractor?
He used nails when they wanted tongue and groove.
Why should you never tell your French doctor that you bite your tongue?
Because your French doctor will give you a tetanus shot.
They say I have a silver tongue, I'll let you make it white.
Yo mama's such a milf, she deserves a tongue punch in the fart box.