Atom jokes

Don't trust atoms, they make up everything.

Two atoms were walking on a street. One atom said to the other: "I'm feeling really positive today," and the other replied: "I know. I stole your electron." Then the first atom said "How Ionic."

Yo momma so fat, she made up of a lot of atoms.

An atom loses an electron... It says, "Man, I really gotta keep an ion them."

When Ant-Man is the size of an atom, how can he breathe?

Sixteen molecules of sodium walk into a bar. Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na BATMAN!!!

I heard oxygen and magnesium were dating, and I was like, "OMg!"

Oxygen and potassium went on a date. I heard it was OK.

Did you know when scientists discovered atoms could split, it blew them all away?

A block of gold walked into a bar. The bartender said, “AU, get out!”

I would say a good joke, but all the good ones Argon.

"Harry Hicks smells of home. Homo is an infection, and infections are made up of atoms."

Q. What did one Iron atom say to the other Iron atom?

A. "We're in the Matrix."

Atoms never touch, so it means, we haven't touched each other or anything. So, sir, I did not drop-kick that child.

A nucleus walked into a bar. He asked the bartender, “How much for a drink?” The bartender replied, “For you, NO CHARGE!”

You're gay.

Think like a proton--stay positive!

Do atoms eat booty? No, because they are too cool. ;)

Does anyone else like Tacos? C'mon let's Taco 'bout it!!! :p Hey, Tacos are made of atoms too......

What did the neutron say to the atom?

"Sandwiches, dude!"