Scientist Jokes

5 out of 6 scientists say Russian Roulette is safe.

What's Stephen Hawking's favorite song?

- They see me rolling.

Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house? No,he hasn't either.

Sucks Stephen Hawking died so soon, the new Intel update just came out.

Did you know when scientists discovered atoms could split it blew them all away?

Stephen hawkings is such a bad role model for our kids

He only ever looks one way when crossing the street

Stephen Hawkings isn't really dead, he's just rebooting

Now that Stephen Hawking is dead the jokes will start to roll in just like he used to.

When Albert Einstein was making the rounds of the speaker’s circuit, he usually found himself eagerly longing to get back to his laboratory work. One night as they were driving to yet another rubber-chicken dinner, Einstein mentioned to his driver (a man who somewhat resembled Einstein in looks & manner) that he was tired of speechmaking.

“I have an idea, boss,” his driver said. “I’ve heard you give this speech so many times. I’ll bet I could give it for you.” Einstein laughed loudly and said, “Why not? Let’s do it!”

When they arrived at the dinner, Einstein donned the driver's cap and jacket and sat in the back of the room. The driver gave a beautiful rendition of Einstein’s speech and even answered a few questions expertly.

Then a supremely pompous professor asked an extremely esoteric question about anti-matter formation, digressing here and there to let everyone in the audience know that he was nobody’s fool. Without missing a beat, the driver fixed the professor with a steely stare and said, “Sir, the answer to that question is so simple that I will let my driver, who is sitting in the back, answer it for me.”