Scientist jokes

Scientists say a banana a day is great for the colon.

But you gotta eat it!

5 out of 6 scientists say Russian Roulette is safe.

What's Stephen Hawking's favorite song?

- They see me rolling.

Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house? No, he hasn't either.

It sucks that Stephen Hawking died so soon, the new Intel update just came out.

Did you know when scientists discovered atoms could split, it blew them all away?

Stephen Hawking is such a bad role model for our kids.

He only ever looks one way when crossing the street.

Stephen Hawking isn't really dead, he's just rebooting.

Now that Stephen Hawking is dead, the jokes will start to roll in just like he used to.

Why is Stephen Hawking a bad role model? -- He doesn't stand for anything.

What is Stephen Hawking's least favorite movie?

Standing Tall.

How did Stephen Hawking please his woman? He uses a hard drive.

When Steven Hawking realizes heaven is only a stairway away.

What is the difference between Stephen Hawking and a walkie-talkie? He doesn't walkie or talkie.

What were Stephen Hawking's last words? "System failure."

Your mama's so fat, scientists found a new planet called Heranus.

I can't find out where Stephen Hawking is from, I just can't place his accent.

What happens when Stephen Hawking dies?

The Windows shutdown sound plays.

What has 4 wheels, 2 legs, and loves his shoulder?

Stephen Hawking.

Why did the scientist want to take off his doorbell?

Because he wanted to win the no-bell prize.