School jokes
Who wants me to bring back the daily School Shooter Jokes?
Popular girl: Sorry I'm late.
Teacher: Why are you late!
Girl: I need my beauty sleep.
Nerd: Well, you might need to hibernate because you ain't pretty.
Whatβs a lungβs favorite type of exercise?
Breathing exercises.
I told this to my English teacher, and he said it to the class, and no one laughed. Someone help!
One of my students asks, "Can I have a bookmark?"
A year of school and they still don't know my name is Danny.
Teachers: Whenever thereβs a school shooting, hide under the desk.
Students: Hiding under desk.
Shooter: Well, no oneβs in here!
Memes
I'm glad we in school now
Even if orphans fail their exams, I'm sure their parents wouldn't...
Oh wait...
In case there's a school shooting, the teachers can help out and shoot the kids.
Why did the 18-year-old girl need a ladder to go to school?
Because it was High School.
Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
Because her students were so bright!
What did the bison say to his son leaving for school?
"Bye son!"
Get it? Bye son, Bison!
How did the shark do on his math test?
Jawesome!
The son margarine shows his father his test that he failed.
Father: Son, you can do butter!
Teacher: What is the capital of Washington?
Dumb kid: The W???
My teacher asked me what my favorite number was yesterday, and I said 2977. I chose 91 for my football jersey number and Sharpied a 1 after the other 1, and my teacher Mr. Jackson's dad died in 9/11, and when he was talking about it Friday the 9th, I threw a paper airplane at him and got suspended for 3 days starting Monday.
Teacher: What does a pig give you?
Little Johnny: Bacon.
Teacher: Good, what does the sheep give you?
Little Johnny: Wool.
Teacher: What does the fat cow give you?
Little Johnny: Homework and says, "Leave, motherfucker."
When you kill people in a war, it's perfectly fine, but when it's a school, everyone has a problem with it, wth.
Kid: Where do I put this paper?
Teacher: I already said go ask your neighbors.
Kid: Ok. *Walks home to his neighbor's house*
Kid: Hey neighbor, I didn't know where to put this paper, and my teacher said to ask you. Do you know?
Neighbor: No, sorry, I don't.
Kid: Okay, bye! *Kid walks back to school.*
Kid: Teacher, my next-door neighbor didn't know.
Teacher: Ugh, you went home?!
Kid: Yes, you told me to!
Teacher: I meant at school!
Kid: Ohhhhhh!
Teacher: Duh!
Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?
So he could get into high school.
What did the priest say when he walked into an elementary school?
Let us prey.
My math teacher walked by and asked me, "What is that?"
I said, "Paper."
She said, "Really?"
I said, "Yeah, do you need glasses?"