School jokes

Teacher: Describe Ukraine history in 3 words?

Student: Ukraine is history!

*New teacher walks in* New Teacher: Hi there, class. My name is Mr. Willy. I will be your math teacher.

*Me in shock, "Willy"* Me: Willy Wonka, is that you?

Why'd Susie go down the slide too fast?

Because her wheelchair was good.

Schools in the hood are kind of the same thing. I always seem to get shot.

When the school shooter is getting roasted because of his Pokemon lunch box, but they don't know that there is a Glock 34 inside.

When the school shooter gives the autistic kid a glock and he shoots himself, thinking it’s a cigarette.

I remember having a crush on my math teacher, so I winked at her and said, "Don't worry, babe, I'll call you later."

Why was the kid not able to cross the hallway?

Answer: The school shooter already shot him in the middle of the hallway.

I love teaching students

how to make them harm themselves.

Did you ever hear the story about the broken pencil?

That's okay. There is really no point to it.

Playing a game called 7-Up.

Student: Why can't I use a pencil to tap their fingers?

Teacher: It's cheating!

Student: No! It's the object of the game.

Hey everyone, I'm back because I'm sinking back towards depression because my sister is really being a bitch, and my parents always side with her, and the stress over online school is just getting overwhelming, and I'm seriously considering hanging myself to end it all because the pain is just... terrible, and I feel like I'm not worth life.

There is this boy in my year; he is in a wheelchair, so I kicked a football at him and pushed him, and then I shouted, "Rocket League!"

Yo mama so old, she was in third grade with Moses.

The kid with a gun walked into my classroom and fucking shot the teacher.

He pointed the gun at me and asked, "What's 2+2?" I answer him and he writes the answer down on his test. He did this with every kid. He got a 100%, expelled, and a lifetime in prison. Hey, at least he gets free food.

Teacher: What's 55 flowers plus 67 flowers?

Kid: A garden?

Teacher: Did I tell you that you're adopted?

Teacher: Why were you late?

Me: Traffic.

Teacher: Did I did it?

Me: Did I even blame it on you?

Bully: Have you ever heard of a brain?

Stupid kid: No.

Bully: You should go get one!

Stupid kid: Wwwwaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!

What is everyone’s favorite class?

None, because people don’t like school.

Good that you got detention because you said that to me; you should've gone to jail.