School

School jokes

Shooting

Teachers: Whenever thereโ€™s a school shooting, hide under the desk.

Students: Hiding under desk.

Shooter: Well, no oneโ€™s in here!

Name

One of my students asks, "Can I have a bookmark?"

A year of school and they still don't know my name is Danny.

Insult

Popular girl: Sorry I'm late.

Teacher: Why are you late!

Girl: I need my beauty sleep.

Nerd: Well, you might need to hibernate because you ain't pretty.

Lung

Whatโ€™s a lungโ€™s favorite type of exercise?

Breathing exercises.

I told this to my English teacher, and he said it to the class, and no one laughed. Someone help!

Girl

Why did the 18-year-old girl need a ladder to go to school?

Because it was High School.

Bison

What did the bison say to his son leaving for school?

"Bye son!"

Get it? Bye son, Bison!

Kill Streak

What do you call a kid laying down in the classroom? Kill confirmed.

What do you call three kids laying down in the classroom? Kill streak.

Kid

Q: What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?

A: Special forces.

Suicide

One day a man buys a rope to commit suicide, but his friend stops him.

They go to a school with lots of happy kids. The guy feels better after a mag.

Gun

1, 2, I have a gun.

3, 4, I am in a school.

5, 6, Everyone on the ground!

Margarine

The son margarine shows his father his test that he failed.

Father: Son, you can do butter!

Thot

Roses are red, violets are not, everyone at Grant High School is probably a thot.

Death

What do your teacher and your friend have in common?

They will both die eventually.