School jokes
How do bees go to school?
They go on a buzzzzzzzzzzz.
Why did the school go remote?
Because the teachers wanted to play with remotes!
Teacher: Here, have candy.
Kid: No, I’m too fat.
Teacher: Shut up, or I’m gonna fail you.
*Next week*
Teacher: Okay kids, get off the floor and go back to your seats.
Kid: I’m too fat to get up.
Teacher: Don’t you remember what I said?
Kid: Yep, elephants don’t forget.
He entered (kindergarten) class. The teacher said, "Luce, start for us and say the alphabet." He said, "A B C D E F G H I J K *just kidding* L M N O." Laugh my nose off. The teacher said, "Go to the office right now, young man!" I don't understand, he just said jokes to the teacher, lmao :D
During school today, a girl gave my friend her number. When I saw it, it was the principal's number.
Prom (DYM 85).
"My sister said she was the only smart one in the class."
"What about the teacher you learn *from*?"
Tired kid with asthma: "It's hard to breathe."
Gym Teacher: "That's alright."
Other Kid: "Hush!"
Over summer, I shot up my school and left a note saying, "I could have done this anytime!"
What do you call a bald science teacher?
HOBBS LOL XD :)
Why don't orphans do homework?
They don't have a home to do it in.
I'm a teacher at a high school, but I got fired. They told me I didn't do any work even though I always did a skele-ton.
My teacher told me to have a good day. SOOOOOOOOOO I went home :)
Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven eight(ate) nine.
Your mama is so fat. Her high school picture is an aerial photograph.
I got sent to the principal's office for telling the kid in the wheelchair to stand up for himself.
I have a friend of mine from school. I always see them with bangs, so I never knew what their forehead looked like until one day they came... Their forehead was bigger than Mount Everest, that you can make an entire Olympics mountain climbing audition on that forehead! :)
True story: In 1986, in the midst of the HIV epidemic, they made condoms available to the public. At that time, me and my boyfriend were 13 years old. My boyfriend was so happy: "These will make great water balloons!" And I was even happier. I did not have to pack a lunch for school tomorrow, lol.
Teacher: What is your name? Me: Written in the stars.
Teacher: Where? Me: A million miles away.
Teacher: What are you talking about? Me: A message to the main.
Teacher: You must change your behavior! Me: Seasons come and go, but I will never change.
Teacher: Go to the school principal NOW! Me: And I'm on my way.
Once Jimmy was minding his own business, then he hears his mom come home. He asked, "Where have you been?" She replied with, "I was at work," yet he knew his mom did not have work. So the next day, while heading to school, he gets a phone call saying his mom is pregnant, and they want to try their device, and they need the baby's dad to say if it's alright.