Say jokes
Me: How do you say yes in Spanish? You: Si. Me: Si if these nuts fit in your mouth.
Ugly face dude: Hi kiddo!
Kid: Hi kid. Leaves.
Kid turns back and says: Wait a minute, who are you?
If we can't say "God" in vain, why does He get to?
What does a hear-moo say? "Fat cow!"
Me: I saw an emo kid that got a haircut today. But instead of saying “Like ya cut g” and slapping the neck, I slapped the wrist and said “Like ya cut’s g.”
Emo kid: He said like your bullet holes, G.
Me: I have no bullet holes.
Emo kid: Not yet, you don't.
Me: Ayo what the fuc*.
Three men walk into a bar. The 1st says, "Hey, how's it going?" The 2nd one says, "Great!" But then the 3rd man says, "Hello, where did my wife go? I swear she was just here!" What happened to the 3rd guy's wife?
What did the plate say to the other plate?
What did the emo guy say to the emo girl?
"Like ur cute g."
I called an orphan's house, saying: "Are your parents home yet?"
He started crying.
The smartest kid in my class says "is-land" instead of "island."
On one hand he was fantastic and the other a spastic. You could say he was a fantastic spastic.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Stephen.
Can't you read? It says "No Hawking."
How do you say “Yes, you look good” in Spanish?
– Sí...
See deez nuts!
What did the soldier say when he saw a terrorist in a wheelchair?
"An RC-XD!"
Why can you say "Kobe" even though you missed?
Because he didn't land either.
What does a pirate say to the president?? Spread your legs so I can get my treasure back.
Sonic says if you're bored, go punch an orphan. I mean, what are they going to do, tell their parents?
Say _______ is so flat that when someone hit them, they got a paper cut!
When someone calls you, say "Welcome to Joe's Pizza Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce."
What did one butt say to the other?
Something brown is slithering down.