Say jokes
What did one butt say to the other?
Something brown is slithering down.
What did the leper say to the hooker? "You can keep the tip."
Me: I saw an emo kid that got a haircut today. But instead of saying “Like ya cut g” and slapping the neck, I slapped the wrist and said “Like ya cut’s g.”
Emo kid: He said like your bullet holes, G.
Me: I have no bullet holes.
Emo kid: Not yet, you don't.
Me: Ayo what the fuc*.
Three men walk into a bar. The 1st says, "Hey, how's it going?" The 2nd one says, "Great!" But then the 3rd man says, "Hello, where did my wife go? I swear she was just here!" What happened to the 3rd guy's wife?
What does a hear-moo say? "Fat cow!"
Memes
I called an orphan's house, saying: "Are your parents home yet?"
He started crying.
The smartest kid in my class says "is-land" instead of "island."
Why can you say "Kobe" even though you missed?
Because he didn't land either.
What did the police say to the ice cream freezer?
So, two people are on a date and the guy says, "Wow, you are so beautiful!"
Then the girl says, "You just want to have sex!"
Then the guy adds, "SMART TO!"
What can't you say to an emo?
Hang in there, buddy!
What did Africa say to the grass? Get off me!
What did the water say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
On one hand he was fantastic and the other a spastic. You could say he was a fantastic spastic.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Stephen.
Can't you read? It says "No Hawking."
How do you say “Yes, you look good” in Spanish?
– Sí...
See deez nuts!
What does a pirate say to the president?? Spread your legs so I can get my treasure back.
What did the female dog say to the mirror?
Hi, bitch!
I needed to take a phone call, so I went to the nearest exit. I guess you can say it was very exciting! 😂
What did the flag say to the pole?
Nothing, he just waved.