Say jokes
What did the pirate say when he saw a ghost? He said, "Oh my God, it's me dead parrot!"
What did the dad say when he left the lollipop store?
"Cya suckers!🍭"
It is a known fact that you cannot say “harassment” without “her ass.”
I guess you could say, “harassment something.”
A man is depressed and he sighs. A bully says, "Stop sighing, you sound like some guys having a threesome!"
What did the traffic light say to the other?
🚦🚥🚦 Stop looking, I'm changing!
What did the big tree say to the little one? Grow a pear!
The patient said, "When will this be over?"
The doctor said, "After you die."
The patient says, "Was that a morbid joke?"
The doctor says, "Well, um, actually, you'll die because we broke the needles and the cure."
The patient says, "Well, it's a bright day, maybe if you weren't clumsy!"
Why do orphans like going to church?
Because they actually get to say "father" for once.
What did Yoda say when he saw himself in 4K? "HDMI."
What did one skeleton say to another?
...nothing... they are dead... what did you expect?
What did the acorn say when it grew up?
Geometry.
(Geometry= "Gee, I'm a tree!")
Hi Alex, you will probably not see this till the morning, but I just wanted to say I have had fun since you were here. Also, thank you so much for protecting me and being there for me. And yeah, have a good day!
I named my dog Stone so that I can say to people that I throw stones every day.
I named my cousin's parrot Michell, and then I started to call Mikey "Mikey", right? I'm starting to teach my cousin Sammy how to say "Mikey Mikey" and he says "mekiy meiky" 😆
Family all eating at the table.
Brother: "Hmm, I think I feel gold."
Sister: "Stop the cap."
Brother looks under the table and says, "Nope, just a gold digger."
Dad laughed.
Stepmom storms out of the room.
Virgos are always virgins to age 17... Just saying.
When someone says "Did I ask?" say "Then why did you respond?"
What did one bee say to the other bee?
"I love you, honey!"
What did the boy say to his brother at chemistry class?
"Hey BrO!"
My jokes are pretty "bone-arifick," if I say so myself. Hehhehe... Get it?