Safety jokes
Why did so many people die in the Grenfell Fire Disaster in London?
All the exit signs were in English.
When you let the school shooter borrow your pen so he doesn't kill you.
Don't turn the toaster sideways, worst mistake of my life.
I'd rate the pilot a 9/11.
Who robs and breaks into people's houses?
Memes
What is the good thing about child molesters? They drive slow in school zones.
Why did the Irishman use three condoms? To be sure, to be sure, to be sure!
Why can't orphans go outside?
Because they have no parents to watch them!
Why can't weapons play baseball?
Because they need to get to home base.
What's the best part of a terrorist on Fourth of July?
The finale.
What do you call a gay kid on fire?
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Cause he would never look both ways.
Why do you like cream instead of bugs?
Because bugs can kill you.
What is one good thing about child molesters?
They drive slow past schools.
The toaster, otherwise the perfect bath bomb.
When you lock the door, but you realize it's a pull open door!
An anti-bullying PSA and speeding PSA from the same creator meet one another.
The death toll went sky high.
Family is precious, so you have to keep them away from the sunlight.
Yesterday a woman stabbed me, so I stabbed her back. Then I realized she was the vaccine woman.
You're the reason the gene pool needs a lifeguard.