My girlfriend asked me to tell a joke. I told her to look in the mirror.
We never met again.
Relationship Jokes
Wyatt is a guy who still doesn't have a girlfriend because he didn't sit with Yanely and Jasmine at lunch. Funny joke, huh?
A boy was following me for 8 years, even into the stall. I finally told him I’m not gay.
Roses are red, the grass is greener,
Every time I think of you, I play with my weenie.
Have you ever heard of Jane Doe? Well, her husband's name is Dill, so I guess that makes him a dildo!
God made Adam and Eve.
Satan made Adam and Steve.
What do you call a gay friend?
Miguel Del Rosario Domingo.
Remember that 18 year old girl I set you up with?
Why not?
Too old.
Why did my dad leave me? Because I was a disappointment.
What's the best part about having sex with twenty-seven year olds?
There's twenty of them!
First Date: HE: "I work with animals every day!"
SHE: "Oh how sweet! What is it that you do?"
HE: "I'm a butcher."
SHE: "We're through!"
My girlfriend broke up with me because I have a small dick. Too bad for her, because I give good sex.
I was talking to my old friend. They said, "We should hang out more!"
I said, "You mean we should ketchup?"
SHAENAYA WANTS TO SUCK EVERYBOYS DICK BESIDES MINE CAUSE SHE A THIRSTY HOE.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
My penis.
Why did Johnny cry?
He was molested by his sister. Johnny enjoyed it, though.
My sister's boyfriend is mad because I fucked his girl.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I know a pedophile,
And he says he knows you.
Me: I’m going to get burrito 🌯
Friend: You can have my burrito baby.
Gay.
Friend: *begins to moan*
Me: Finna hang up.
A guy walks into the house carrying a sheep and says out loud, "This is the pig I screw when you're on the rag."
His wife replies, "That's not a pig, it's a sheep."
He says, "I was talking to the sheep."
