Relationship jokes
What's the difference between anal and oral?
Oral makes your day whereas anal makes your whole weak.
Tell your mom happy last night. 🍆 in my bed.
Like and comment if you will be my friend!
Your mama is so ugly, her shadow got a restraining order.
I love pussy.
Memes
What is it that gay men can't get from having too much oral sex?
Erectile dysfunction.
I'm going to destroy your momma's [vulgar term] just like I destroyed that Tastykake.
Are you still a virgin?
If you do IT
With no one?
What do a Rubik's cube and a dick have in common? The more you play with them, the harder they get.
What does a baby computer call his father?
Data!
Why'd the rubber go flying across the room?
Because it got pissed off!
Penis ➕ ➕ ➕ 🕳
inside 🚹 🚹 restroom
equals 😋 🍌 🍌 🍌 inside
glory 🕳
Guys, my girlfriend calls me: "911, help! There’s a strange man in my room and I think he’s on drugs!"
She’s so nice.
Welcome to the Friend Zone! It’s lonely here.
"Gwen, I want my boyfriend back!"
Some kid with parents: "Knock, knock."
Orphan: "Who's there?"
Some kid with parents: "Not your parents."
My wife slept with another man and got pregnant. She told me 9 weeks later. I said it's ok and told her let's talk downstairs, so I pushed her down the stairs.
My wife told me to pass her some chapstick, but then I realized she hasn’t talked to me in a month, then remembering I gave her super glue.........ehh I’m done with her big ass mouth.
My wife walked in on me cheating on her and said, "How could you cheat on me?!" I said, "She was lying naked on the table what I was supposed to do?" and my wife responded with, "Perform the autopsy."
What did the female rapper say when her boyfriend pulled his pants down and exposed his huge balls?
“I like big nuts and I cannot lie!”