Relationship jokes
GF: What did you use as kissing when you were little?
Me: My sister.
SWEET HOME ALABAMAA
The orphan: why don't my parents love me? Me: because you don't have any.
Q: What is found deep inside of us, and the more we express our love for each other the more it spreads throughout the world?
A: Covid.
I once was playing with my friend and Roblox girlfriend, then one day, they cheated on me. I broke up with her and unfriended him, then I saw my mom and my uncle crying!
Me be like: ;-;
When you meet your gf at the family reunion.
Yo mama so fat she got married by 20 men, but they think there's only one side of her! I tried making one of my own.
What do you do when your sister asks you “Why are you sad?”
Reply back with “Because you were born.”
I named my dog Stone so that I can say to people that I throw stones every day.
When your crush walks in class but you're homeschooled...
Hey daddy *winky face*
What is the difference between you and a calendar?
A calendar has dates.
I asked my dad to come to my Father’s Day breakfast.
The orphanage worker just said, “Don’t be silly!”
Have you ever seen that weird ad that pops up at the bottom: sexy Russian babes looking for men older than 30, and they're 18, so is it a reverse pedo? Oh well.
Mummy, how was I born?
Mummy replied, "Well, your father and I got married, and soon I became fat and you came out, and then in, out, in, out, and after you did that a million times, you were born."
A man and woman were having sex. After they were done, the man asks the woman, "Are you a nurse?" The woman answers, "Yes. How did you know?" The man replies, "Because you took care of me so well." Then the woman asks the man, "Are you an anesthesiologist?" He says proudly, "Yes. How do you know?" The woman answers, "Because I didn't feel a thing."
One day I caught my sister talking to my girlfriend, and she said, "You never told me you're lesbian." I said, "No, not at all." My girlfriend asked, "Why did you not tell her?" and I said, "Because every time I bring a girl home, I hear too much noise in her room, and I never get the chance to kiss them because she's cleaning the trash." She said, "Yeah, the trash is her junk."
Blondes like their men how they like their rice: brown, 500 at a time, and all in her bowl.
Your mom disrespected your dad when he saw your face.
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Your mom." "Your mom who?" "It's not your mom, it's my mom!"
I lick cows for my mother.