Relationship jokes

"Knock, knock."

"Who's there?"

"Not."

"Not who?"

"Not your dad."

What does a woman call Stormzy in bed?

Stiff chocolate.

What did the cell phone say to his wife?

"I will give you a ring."

I told my mum that a few guys tell me that you're a MILF.

My mom said what that is. I reply, "Mom, I'd Like To Fuck." My mum started out to laugh, then she told me, "Well, now you need a new stepdad."

What's wrong with 89?

You blow me and I owe you one.

So, my friend's birthday is in a couple of days, and I was wondering what to get him.

He hangs out at my house a lot, so I suggested adoption papers.

Yo' mama is a joke.

Why can't an orphan have sex?

Because they can't call them "daddy."

My wife left me and took the kids.

My dads just like my eggs... runny. 🤣😭🥺

Women are like tornadoes.

They scream when they are coming and take your house when they are leaving.

POV them: What's one move to get a man motivated in bed?

Her: All you gotta give is that hawk tuah and spit on that thang, you get me?

Stephen Hawking was an unfaithful man. He had an affair with Alexa.

Why did tube date electricity? Because he would light up when she touched him.

🌍: You're so hot!

🌎: How are you single?

☀️: I burn anyone who gets too close!

I was gonna tell you a joke about my abusive dad...

But I only remember the punch line👊👊👊👊👊👊👊👊👊

My step bro thought I was single and tried to take me, but I said, "I'm take." And guess what he did? He cried.

Why? Why would you do that?

I remember having a crush on my math teacher, so I winked at her and said, "Don't worry, babe, I'll call you later."

American says: "US mein shaadi E-mail se hoti hai..."

Sardar ji says: "Accha, India me to shaadi.....Fe-mail se hoti hai...!!!"

I heard that the numbers on the front of your credit card represent the number of minutes until you meet the 💕 love of your life!💕

And the 3 numbers on the back represent the month and day you make it official!!

Comment those numbers to lock it in!!😄