Relationship jokes

Are you a toaster, because I want to have a bath with you.

I have an awesome sex drive. My girlfriend lives 40 miles away.

I was an orphan as a kid, and I'm pretty sure my favorite thing was seeing parents with their kids.

I think we know why.

My wife and I’s gay marriage counselor advised us to watch porn together. So, we decided to try it out one day and search up lesbian shemale porn.

And that’s the day she found out she was a porn star.

Girl: Wanna come over to my house?

Orphan: I have to ask if my parents come home.

Orphans want girlfriends to call someone "Mommy."

Everybody is mad because that guy from Alberta punched a girl in a wheelchair.

I think he was upset because he found out his sister was cheating on him.

You: Knock knock. Other person: Who is there? You: Not your parents.

What do you call someone who is extra virgin?

Mrs. Frame.

When your mom says, "Go to bed," but you reply with, "But Mom, I need help because it is inside, but we are outside."

Dad: Son, you're adopted.

Son: Oh wow, I wonder who my real parents are.

Dad: We are your real parents. Your adopted parents are coming to pick you up.

I once dated a math teacher. It turned out she was nothing but problems.

Random kid: Yo mama so stupid that she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl.

Orphan: What's a mama?

Random kid: *shook*

The news of the brother getting sucked off regularly by his sister spread really fast... all over her face 🤤.

Why did the orphan call her boyfriend "daddy"?

Because she wanted that D.

Are you a volcano? Because you're hot and I really lava you!

What did Joe say when he saw his girlfriend sleeping with his sister?

Nothing, he just started wanking.

You’re so ugly, I can see why your dad left now.

Why do women always have sex with the lights off?

Because they never like to see a man having a good time.

Who am I rooting for during the Super Bowl? Easy. Taylor Swift.