Puns
A dog talks to another dog and says,
"Wow, you're a hot dog!"
I have a joke about construction.
I'm still working on it.
Random person: "What's one thing your ex gave you that you can't get rid of?"
Man: *Shows a picture of his child.*
What do you call someone who makes a joke about Bread society?
The Doughker.
Did you hear about the guy who died by lethal injection and writhed on the stretcher for 20 minutes?
I guess it really IS all in the execution.
Boss: How good are you at PowerPoint?
Me: I Excel at it.
Boss: Was that a Microsoft pun?
Me: Word.
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts, this ain't no ordinary blow job!
Ever since we started quarantining, I've only been telling inside jokes.
TFW you're having sex with your German girlfriend and she won't stop telling you her age.
What's the difference between you and Hitler? At least he knows how to use an oven.
What does a pirate say to his girlfriend?
I want your booty!
What's the most horrifying video in the world?
Logan Paul vlogs.
What planets do Astronauts like to pee on?
Uranus!
(Say this out loud and it will make more sense.)
Why did Sally fall off the swings?
Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally!
What's the difference between a fish and a car?
You can tune a car... but you can't TUNA fish! x3
Quin loves Robin. All he says is "Robin." This isn't a joke; Quin's gay.
So, apparently, Hitler's dad was quite the abusive fellow, always beating his son.
Guess that's why he's called (Hit)ler.
What does a glass of water ask a pond?
"Water you doing?"
What does the pond answer?
"Pondering life."
What do you call someone with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
America: I'm going to build a wall.
Nazi: Been there.
Soviet Union: Done that.