Puns

What's the difference between a fish and a car?

You can tune a car... but you can't TUNA fish! x3

Quin loves Robin. All he says is "Robin." This isn't a joke; Quin's gay.

So, apparently, Hitler's dad was quite the abusive fellow, always beating his son.

Guess that's why he's called (Hit)ler.

What does a glass of water ask a pond?

"Water you doing?"

What does the pond answer?

"Pondering life."

What do you call someone with a rubber toe?

Roberto.

America: I'm going to build a wall.

Nazi: Been there.

Soviet Union: Done that.

Why did the squirrel swim on its back?

So it didn't get its nuts wet.

What is a rabbit's favorite type of jewelry?

Carats.

What's a cat's favorite color? Purr-ple.

All these sea monster jokes are just kraken me up.

Can we have a party in space?

First, we need to planet ;)

Get it? "Plan it" = planet.

What happens when two pieces of bread from the same loaf have sex?

They become in-bread.

I met a really greedy oyster. It was quite shellfish.

What song was played at the flatulent centenarian's birthday? Candle in the Wind!

"Are you taco to me? I nacho friend."

I was in a maze and I got to the end and they congratulated me. I said that was a-maze-ing!

I read a story about a rabbit being raised. It was a hare-raising tale!

Question: Why don't cannibals eat clowns?

Answer: Because they taste funny!

What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta!

Did you hear about the band Manhole? I hear they're a metal cover.