Oven

Oven Jokes

Nobody

Nobody

Literally nobody

Gordan Ramsey: do you need me to bring Hitler back to life so he can show you how to use a fucking oven?

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  • Mum

    Your mum is so bad at cooking, Gordon Ramsey brought back Hitler to show her how to use an oven.

    Cigarette

    Little Johnny walks out to the garage and sees Dad smoking a cigarette. He asks, "Hey Dad, can I have a puff of that cigarette?" Dad asks, "Well, Johnny, can your dick reach your ass?" Little Johnny scratches his head and thinks about it for a moment. He then replies, "Well, no, Dad, my dick can't reach my ass." His Dad says, "There's your answer, Johnny..." Little Johnny goes back in the house.

    About an hour later, Little Johnny comes back out to the garage and sees his Dad drinking a beer. He asks, "Hey Dad, can I have some of that beer?" Dad asks, "Well, Johnny, can your dick reach your ass?" Little Johnny scratches his head and thinks about it for a moment. He then replies, "Well, no, Dad, my dick can't reach my ass." His Dad says, "There's your answer, Johnny..." Little Johnny goes back in the house.

    About an hour later, Little Johnny comes back out to the garage with a big plate of Tollhouse Chocolate Chip cookies, fresh from the oven. His Dad says, "Wow, Johnny, those sure look like some good cookies. You think I can have some?" Little Johnny asks his Dad, "Well Dad, can your dick reach your ass?" His Dad scratches his head and thinks about it for a moment. He then replies, "Well, yes, Johnny, I do believe my dick can reach my ass." Little Johnny says, "Well, Dad, you can go FUCK yourself, cuz Mom made these cookies for me!!!"

    Morbid humor

    1. What's the difference between Dark humor and Morbid humor? Dark humor is 10 babies in 1 trash can and Morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trash cans.

    2. What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven.

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  • Like

    1 like = 1 kid in my oven. I'm trying to get followers and comments, please.

    Girl

    A girl asked me to eat her out one time... so I put her in the oven.

    Gay Guy

    What's the difference between a gay guy and a microwave?

    The microwave doesn't brown the meat.

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  • Hitler

    What do you call it when Hitler puts retards in the oven? Baked potatoes.

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  • Bacon

    Why is bacon called bacon and cookies called cookies if you cook bacon and bake cookies?

    Morgue

    Welcome to Morgan's Morgue and Pizzeria where yesterday's loss is today's sauce!

    Hitler

    Q. What did Hitler give his niece for her birthday?

    A. An easy bake oven.

    Baby

    What is red and cries and spins around and around?

    - A baby in a microwave.

    Maid

    What is the difference between a Mexican maid and a Jewish maid?

    One of them won’t clean the oven.