Baby

guacamole n.... p....

what do you call a baby in an oven? my next meal

4

Girl

Anonymous

A girl asked me to eat her out one time… so i put her in the oven

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German

Anonymous

Nobody Literally nobody Gordan Ramsey: do you need me to bring Hitler back to life so he can show you how to use a fucking oven

1

Difference

Anonymous
  1. What’s the difference between Dark humor and Morbid humor? Dark humon is 10 babies in 1 trash can and Morbid humor is 1 baby in 10 trash cans
  2. What’s the difference between a pizza and a baby? A pizza dosent scream in the oven.

Little Johnny

The Aphabet

Little Johnny was in kindergarten and his teacher said, “okay everyone, Tomorrow you must come to school and recite the first three letters of the alphabet”. Johnny didn’t know the alphabet so he decided to ask his family. He walked in the kitchen to find his mom on the phone. He says, “Mamma, what’s the first letter of the alphabet?” His mom doesn’t notice him standing there and says, “If you don’t shut the fuck up right now-” So he goes to find his brother watching TV and he says, “Tommy what’s the Second letter of the alphabet?” His brother doesn’t notice him and says, “I’m Batman”. So He went to his Grandma who was knitting and says, “Grandma what’s the third letter of the Alphabet?” The grandma then realizes she left her biscuits in the oven for too long and says, “My biscuits are burning! My Biscuits are burning!” Satisfied with the answers given to him he thinks it over and goes to school the next morning. When his teacher come to Johnny she says, “Johnny what are the first three letters of the alphabet?” “If you don’t shut the fuck up right now” - Johnny "Who do you think you are young man to talk to someone like me that way?" - teacher "I’m Batman" - Johnny The teacher whups his ass and little johnny says, “My biscuits are burning! My Biscuits are burning!”

Later that day he understands what happened and can’t tell which was worse that he accidentally cussed to his teacher or that his family was ignoring him.

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Potato

Wheelchair69

What do you call it when hitler puts retards in the oven? Baked potatoes

0

Birthday

tiny Hitler

Q. What did Hitler give he’s niece for her birthday A. An easy bake oven

Difference

Anonymous

What’s the difference between putting a baby and a pizza in an oven? The pizza doesn’t scream in the oven

Breakfast

Anonymous

One day there were two muffins in an oven, one of the muffins said, “man its hot in here.” The other one said “Oh my god! A talking muffin!!!”

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War

Rata

When Kim jong-un said nuke the chinese, he meant put the take away in the oven. Some simple misunderstandings start a war.

Catch

PrettyPasaska

Is your oven running?? Then u better go catch it

Brick

Fireplace

Nobody really liked our fireplace. So I turned it into a brick pizza oven. Idk why but now everyone likes our fireplace.

Burger

Anonymous

What did hitler get for his 6th birth day???

A KEWsy burger and an easy bake oven

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Car

Awesome spoon

There was a car accident and the cops pull up to the crime seen to start asking people questions. The police started talking to a blonde lady and said what happened here she responded by saying a car crash. They then asked but how did it happen, she responded the cars crashed into each other. They finally said but why did it happen. The lady said oh i know where your going with this. It happened because when cars push on the gas peddle the car goes forward and they both pushed it so they both went forward and hit each other. One cop said never mind ma’m and they stared walking away. The blonde lady then said oh and officers my computer froze do you think i should put in the microwave or in the oven?

Difference

Anonymous

Whats the difference between a baby and a pizza? One dose not crow when you put it in an oven

Fire

Mertens

When you put the chicken in the oven and it goes down and the oven explodes oven and smoke and everything is fire and on fire and flies to the grass and all goes back

Man

Anonymous

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says to the other, “Man, it’s hot in here”. The other muffin says, “OH MY GOSH A TALKING MUFFIN!!!”

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Tree

barik

What is the best way to make a leaf. Go down back around and stir up a tree. Make it spin watch again. Oven baking ding we’re done!

Hotness

Overwatch_Gamer321

There are two muffins baking in the oven. One muffin says to the other, “Phew, is it getting hot in here or is it just me?” The other muffin says, “AAAAHHH!! A TALKING MUFFIN!”

Face

Allan C.

One of my earliest memories is seeing my mother’s face through the oven window. As we played hide and seek and she said: “You’re getting warmer!”.