Now Jokes

I told my new girlfriend that my mother is deaf...

So she would have to speak loudly and slowly.

I told my mother that my new girlfriend is disabled. Now we wait.

What do genders and the twin towers have in common? There used to be 2, but now they're a sensitive topic...

Husband: “Honey, what’s the difference between a Ferrari and an erect*on?” Wife: “ok... what is it?” Husband: “I don’t have a Ferrari right now”.

Millions of people are doing the exact same thing as you are right now.

What do the twin towers and genders have in common? There used to be two of them but now it's a sensitive subject.

(True story) Today I was bring some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “oh, now they’re broken.” And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”

Ok guys I have one last joke (for now) What do you call it when panera is over Panera end

doctors in the middle ages, Plague doctor: "i must have some herbs to block out bad air" docters now: "God, wtf were we doing back then"

I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, “Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?” She said, “No, I hate myself now.” – Rodney Dangerfield

What does Kobe now have in common with his helicopter? They both have torn rotators.

Bro Kobe Bryant is singing with the basketball team in his helicopter celebrating right now I bet

Oh wait I forgot

You look good now, but you’d look better hanging from my ceiling. ;)

What do genders and the twin towers have in common?

There used to be two now it’s a sensitive subject

ROBERT LEWANDISNEY SONG

Give me freedom Give me fire Give me contract Or I retire

Jog all day Out of UCL now FC Barcelona I need you now

Villarreal defenders They surround me Big submarines All around me

I get upset Call my agent I want money I’m impatient

Little Johny sits on a chair. He notices he is sitting on something, Then he sees a plastic di##. He asks his mom whats that and mom didnt now. so when his dad comes home from work he sees him with the plastick di## and says son why uy messing with my personal toy

I told an orphan two never stop talking until their parents come home

Now I can’t get it to shut up

One day I threw a boomerang...

Now i live in constant fear

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