Airport Jokes

Yo Mama so stupid that when she saw a sign that said, “Airport Left,” she turned around and went home.

Confucius says, man who walks through airport door sideways with erection, is going to Bangkok.

I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. -- I lost my case.

I would like to complain about the new sushi restaurant at Gatwick Airport. Although there were large portions going round on the conveyor, they did taste a bit like luggage.

Q: If a boat could fly where would it go?

A: an airport

Welcome onboard Sexist Airlines. Everyone, please fasten your seatbelts now as we are switching to a female pilot.

I lost my luggage at an airport once. I sued the airline, but I lost the case...

What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an airplane landing strip? Don't know, neither did my dad.

Q: how come in airports,they park the planes outside? A: they don't belong in buildings

What do you call an Indian plane that comes back?

A Boomerang

What did the North tower say to the south tower? "Sorry, can't talk, got to catch a plane."

I just watched a 9/11 documentary on a plane Man next me said you know we’re going to New York right I told him I just wanna know what I got into

control tower to Boeing 747 your clear to land on (said person) forehead

What did the plane say to the tower? Give me a kiss.

Did you know if you give a guy a plane ticket he flys once but if you push him out of plane he flys for the rest of his life

Last week, I was on a plane to Manchester when suddenly the plane was hit by a ball. I wondered where it came from, but I soon realized it was none other than Penaldo practicing his free kicks. Shame on you, Penaldo, for almost killing me!