I wish the grass in my backyard was emo so it would cut itself.
My Jokes
What is the difference between a woman and my fridge?
Only one moans when I put my meat in it.
I broke up with my RBLX gf, and I heard my uncle crying in the other room.
I wish the grass outside of my house was emo, because it would cut itself.
My last 15 minutes as a 23 y/o!!
It's not my birthday, but a scary-looking man with a crowbar just broke into my house.
"Discuss the synopsis of this poem: My Friend Billy Has A Ten-Foot Willy."
My ex is like AIDS! I can't get rid of him.
My friends:
Maya: I only get 9 hours of sleep.
Josh: 9 hours? I get 7 hours of sleep.
Noah: You get 7? I get 4 hours of sleep.
Me: You guys are getting sleep...
Are you my fish? Because you're supposed to be dead.
My sister says I’m annoying, or that’s what I read in her diary.
My dad went to get milk from Tesco’s.
He never came back.
Wow, my own joke. Category: I problem won’t remember this.
Yo, Bloon... what bitch where the fuck my child support camo Bloon? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
So, my son is into astronomy, and he asked how stars die. I said, "Usually overdose."
Ok, so my brother made this, here it is:
Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken. Chicken who? Chicken garbage!
Ok I know it makes no sense, but he made it when he was like 3.
I sleep in a castle once every 2 weeks.
It's my fort knight.
When I see James Charles, my popcorn goes pop pop.
A man walked into a shop and asked the shop keeper for a potato clock.
The shop keeper said, "I don't know what a potato clock is."
The man said, "Me neither, but I'm starting a new job and my boss told me work starts at 9, so I'd have to get a potato clock."
I called my dog J. They said, "Joné."
My wife and I have reached the decision that we do not want children.
If anyone does, please comment your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
