Charity Jokes

I did a bungee jump for charity recently. It was called "spastics on elastics."

I'm doing a charity bungee jump for the local disabled.

It's called "spastics on elastics."

If prostitution had a tax-exempt status, and if an adult bookstore had a tax-exempt status because of a glory hole, churches would have to do something else to keep their tax-exempt status to avoid the risk of going out of business.

A woman approached me in the street the other day with one of those charity collection buckets and asked me: Do you know how often people die from AIDS?

I said: Now I'm no expert, but I think it's only once.

I won the lottery for a million dollars today, so I decided to donate a quarter of it to charity.

I now have $999,999.75.

I was thrown out of the charity food kitchen on my first night of volunteering.

All I said was, "Hurry up, some of us got homes to go to..."

I take debt of 25,000 euro. I spend 20,000 in charity, and 5000 euro are left. I pay the debt of 2000 euro and I have to pay now 23,000 euro to bank, and 3000 euro I have in profit, 23,000 +3000 >> 26000 ;)

Today I donated my watch, phone, and $500 to a poor guy. You wouldn't believe the happiness I felt as he slid the pistol back into his pocket.

I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, it doesn't have a homepage.

Today, a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.

I donated 100 dollars to a blind children’s charity. Too bad they won’t ever see a dime of it.

What do milk and Make-A-Wish kids have in common? They both have expiration dates.

Welcome to Dave's Orphanage. "You make it, we take it."

If you watch Jaws backwards, it's a heartwarming story about a shark that gives arms and legs to disabled people.

Did you hear about Johnny Depp's shelter for abused women? It's going as well as Michael Jackson's children's hospital!

Once I saw a girl crying and asked, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at orphanages.

It's the season of giving, so I'll be giving up!

Who says Rihanna isn't charitable?

I mean, she found Johnny Depp for her fashion show by scouting for people living in tents down in Skid Row.

What's the same about "Make a Wish Program" and "Dark Jokes"?

They never get old.

I don't get this. Why is it I go to an orphanage and all of a sudden they said I used to be the cutest baby there?