Charity jokes

I did a bungee jump for charity recently. It was called "spastics on elastics."

If prostitution had a tax-exempt status, and if an adult bookstore had a tax-exempt status because of a glory hole, churches would have to do something else to keep their tax-exempt status to avoid the risk of going out of business.

I won the lottery for a million dollars today, so I decided to donate a quarter of it to charity.

I now have $999,999.75.

A woman approached me in the street the other day with one of those charity collection buckets and asked me: Do you know how often people die from AIDS?

I said: Now I'm no expert, but I think it's only once.

I was thrown out of the charity food kitchen on my first night of volunteering.

All I said was, "Hurry up, some of us got homes to go to..."

I intern at an orphanage that burned down this weekend with 30 kids inside.

Thankfully, I don’t have to call and tell their parents.

I take debt of 25,000 euro. I spend 20,000 in charity, and 5000 euro are left. I pay the debt of 2000 euro and I have to pay now 23,000 euro to bank, and 3000 euro I have in profit, 23,000 +3000 >> 26000 ;)

Why did the crows form a charity?

Because it's all for good caws!

Have you heard of the foundation called Autism Speaks?

No, it screeches.

I'm doing a charity bungee jump for the local disabled.

It's called "spastics on elastics."

Why do people adopt orphans?

They get cash.

Why do crabs never give to charity? Because they’re shellfish.

Hahahahahahahaha what a knee slapper!

How do you disappoint people in Africa?

Send a message saying that you’re going to send trucks full of food, water, and clothing.

But don’t follow through and send the trucks empty.

"Why are all these orphans here?" said Chris.

"Because their dad went to go get the milk," said MrBeast.

3 Years Later,

"I AM GIVING APPLE IN A SHARE TO EVERY ORPHAN IN THE WORLD, AND I'M ALSO GIVING EACH OF THEM 1000000000000 DOLLARS."

I gave a homeless person a phone but did not give him a home button.

One day I was walking next to a homeless man, and he was eating grass. I asked him if he was hungry. He said yes. I said, "Follow me." You should have seen his face when I showed him my backyard!

Why do crabs never give to charity? Because they're all shellfish.

I burnt down an orphanage and then showed an orphan the orphanage that I burned down, and he loved it. Not really, though.

I just donated $100 to a blind children's charity, suck that no one will see it.

What does a frozen loading screen and a Make-A-Wish kid have in common?

They both couldn't make it all the way.