Man jokes
There was a boy in the gym who was in his late teens. He was sitting at the dumbbells tables, but he wasn't lifting. He instead, sat up and was ripping something up.
The manager then walked over to him and asked, "You're hogging the dumbbells, dude! What are you even doing?" The boy hesitated, then said, "Getting ripped, wanna join me?" as he held up stacks of blank paper. The man silently sat on the table with him and grabbed some papers. "Why not?" he finally said.
Give a man a match, he'll be warm for a while. But set a man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
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A man walked into a library and asked for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian responds with, "Fuck off, you won't bring it back!"
After a surgery, a man claimed he couldn't feel his legs. I replied, "Of course not, I amputated your fucking arms!"
An atom loses an electron... It says, "Man, I really gotta keep an ion them."
This man got his left arm and left leg cut off, and someone asked him, "How are you?" And he said, "I’m all right now."
Officer sees a man and he is seeing he is having trouble walking, so he asked him, "Sir, are you drunk?" The man responds, "No, sir, I'm not drunk." So the officer asks, "How high are you?" And the man responds, "No sir, it's 'Hi, how are you?'"
Yo mama's so fat, a man has to bring climbing equipment to kiss her on the cheek.
A man was mowing his lawn when blue and red stuff came out instead of grass. Next thing he knew, a smurf was on his shoulder asking if he’s seen his friend.
What do you call getting assaulted by a gay man? Fruit punch.
Why did the Mexican man push his wife off a cliff?
Tequila.
Monkey Man's mortuary, you stab 'em, we slab 'em.
What is 6 inches tall when bricked up and is loved by women?
A strong man’s biceps.
So a blind man walks into a bar.
At least he thinks so.
One man's pet is another man's dinner.
I support men.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To try to get away from the man.
Why did the man cross the road?
Because his d**k was stuck in the chicken.
Why did the man yell at the other? To tell a pun.
Guy with no arms: Even if I don’t have arms, I can do everything you can do.
🎵if you’re happy and you know it clap your hands🎵