We all know Albert Einstein was a genius, but his brother Frank was a monster.
What's Moby Dick's dad's name? Papa Boner.
Q. What monster plays the most April Fools' pranks?
A. Prankenstein.
An emo man asked a librarian for a suicide book. She said no because you won't bring it back.
Roses are red, fishers are fishing,
I really hope you’ll be reported missing.
What's the difference between an orphan and a second-hand book?
The second-hand book was loved once.
Did you know the past tense of William Shakespeare is Wouldiwas Shookspeared?
Okay, what do you call a dummy that writes a dumb writer?
What is the tallest building in the entire world? The library, because it has so many stories.
They put the woman's rights in the fantasy section in the library.
I just got a job at the prison library.
It has its prose and cons.
Why doesn't Voldemort have a human nose?
Because his snake bit it off!
What if little Johnny was doing drugs?
"Johnny, Johnny?"
"Yes, Papa?"
"Eating sugar?"
"No, Papa..."
What's Peter Pan's favorite place to eat out?
Wendy's?
1, 2 buckle my shoe.
3, 4 buckle some more.
5, 6 Nike kicks.
1, 2 buckle my shoe.
3, 4 open the door.
5, 6 Nike kicks.
What do cannibals read?
People.
Digest Readers.
My girlfriend's sister told me to write her a poem. This is what I came up with:
roses are red, violets are blue, if you ever feel alone, I'm always watching you.
I just wrote a book on reverse psychology. Do not read it.
Dr. Seuss dark jokes.
Hey there little mister, I'm dating your sister!
What's the name of a crazy crap that wins everything? Winnie da Pooh.
