Literature jokes

What's the difference between an orphan and a second-hand book?

The second-hand book was loved once.

My favorite novel is "The Hunchback of Notre Dame".

I love a protagonist with a twisted back story.

Why did Helen Keller’s dog run away?

I would too if my name was Braille.

Where in the nursery rhyme does it say Humpty Dumpty was an egg?

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Stephen.

Can't you read? It says "No Hawking."

Yo mama so stupid, she thought Sodapop Curtis was actual soda.

What grade does Sherlock hit on girls from?

Elementary, my dear Watson!

Hi, um okay... Knock! Knock! Who's there? Doris! Doris who? Doris look I need the key!

Um...oh here another one! Okay...so sorry I type random things on these joke sites...anyway...okay. What is a book never written: "Beautiful sites of the corel rife written by the ocean!"

What’s a gay person’s favorite book?

The dictionary.

Why is Harry Potter an orphan's favorite character?

Because Harry Potter has no parents, so it’s relatable.

Have you heard of the new book about anti-gravity?

Well, I just can't seem to put it down.

Someone was throwing Stephen King books at everyone. I had no idea why though...

Then IT hit me.

Have you heard of the book about the transgender whale?

It’s called "Maybe Dick."

Why didn't the boy want to read "2000 Leagues Under the Sea"?

It was too much pressure.

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

Summer wasn't too bad either.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down!

A man went into a library and asked for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian said:

"F*ck off! You won’t bring it back."

I just got a job at the prison library.

It has its prose and cons.

An emo man asked a librarian for a suicide book. She said no because you won't bring it back.

Salman Rushdie got a new book out.

It's called "Buddha. You Fat Cunt."