Literature jokes

When I was a kid, I used to read a lot. I mainly grew up reading stories by Shakespeare, especially the story Romeo & Juliet. That one in particular taught me a valuable life lesson. It taught me to not be surprised when my girlfriend killed herself.

What's the difference between Harry Potter and Anne Frank?

Harry made it out of the chamber.

Someone was throwing Stephen King books at everyone. I had no idea why though...

Then IT hit me.

A man went into a library and asked for a book on how to do suicide, and the librarian said, "Fuck off, you won't bring it back."

"You're an orphan forever," - Harry Potter.

Roses are red, fishers are fishing,

I really hope you’ll be reported missing.

Why does Waldo wear stripes?

'Cause he doesn't want to be spotted.

What is the difference between a book and a Mexican?

One has papers.

A woman walks into a library and asks if they have any books about paranoia. The librarian says, "They're right behind you!"

What's a book never written? Beautiful sights by a mountain, by a rocky hill!

I was reading a great book about an immortal cat the other day. It was impossible to put it down.

I had to write an essay about Africa, and I failed because I plagiarized the Hunger Games script.

An emo man asked a librarian for a suicide book. She said no because you won't bring it back.

What's the difference between an orphan and a second-hand book?

The second-hand book was loved once.

What's Moby Dick's dad's name? Papa Boner.

Did you know the past tense of William Shakespeare is Wouldiwas Shookspeared?

Q. What monster plays the most April Fools' pranks?

A. Prankenstein.

We all know Albert Einstein was a genius, but his brother Frank was a monster.

I don’t get why Katniss was bitching so much in ‘The Hunger Games’ books. Ethiopia has been competing for years and I don’t hear any of them complaining.

I asked the librarian if the library had any books on paranoia.

She whispered, "They're right behind you!"